Dell laughed. ?I can?t be more than three years older than you, girl. Dell is just fine.?

Hodge grinned. ?Dell, then.?

?Good to meet you, too. D?s pretty high on you.?

Gathering that ?D? was Dylan, Hodge nodded, barely managing to keep a blush from coloring her cheeks.

Dell looked over to her partner. ?I?m gonna take the baby up for a nap. You guys want anything before I go up??

?No thank you,? Hodge replied.

?We?ll be fine, baby,? Shauna answered, kissing her partner and daughter. ?Be up in a bit.?

After Dell had climbed the circular staircase and disappeared from sight, Shauna turned to Hodge. ?C?mon, let?s get comfortable.?

Hodge followed her hostess through another door and into what Shauna called a sunroom, which looked like a very large glassed in porch. Hodge liked it immediately. She was directed to a large, overstuffed leather recliner and sat down, enjoying the comfort. Shauna took the chair?s twin, easing her long body down into it with a groan of relief. ?Damn back?s still screwed up,? she grumbled under her breath.

?Will you be okay before the season starts??

Shauna grinned. ?Oh yeah. No problem there.? Her smile faded just slightly. ?D tells me you got some questions about the politics in the league.?

A bit uncomfortable, Hodge rubbed at the back of her neck. ?Well, I do. Kind of. But I don?t want to intrude on your privacy.?

?Girl,? Shauna said, laughing, ?you?re not intruding on anything. Dylan trusts you, and that?s alright by me. Go on and ask your questions. I won?t bite.?

?Well,? Hodge said, still unsure, ?they have to do with?being gay.?

With a huge grin, Shauna leaned forward, clasping her large hands between her knees. ?You need some pointers? Alright! I can do that!?

Hodge laughed, feeling instantly better. ?No, no. No pointers. I need to know what it?s like?being gay in the league. How do you live your life without worrying about breaking the rules? I mean, I?ve lived openly for so long. How do I go back into the closet??

Shauna slumped back in her chair. ?Aw, Cat. It ain?t about going back into the closet. It?s about keeping your public face away from your private one. You understand??

?No, not really.?

?It?s like this, Cat. Once you go big time, you live in a bubble. A glass one. You might think you?re a basketball player, but you?re really fanbait. Once you take your first step out onto the court as a pro, your life isn?t your own anymore. You belong to them.?

?Them??

?The crowd. The people who pay to watch you play. If you?re any good at it, and D thinks you?re gonna be, they?ll wanna know everything about you. Everything.?

?God,? Hodge whispered, feeling a heavy, smothering weight descend upon her shoulders. ?How do you cope??

?You cope, my friend, by digging out this little piece of your life that?s yours and only yours. And you guard it, man, you guard it like it?s fuckin? Fort Knox. And the only people you let in are the people you want to let in.? Keeps favored Hodge with a look heavy with compassion. ?On the outside, you?re all smiles, the league?s newest sensation. But on the inside, where it counts, you?re you. You gotta keep ?em separated, or you?ll go down. Hard.?

Hodge thought about this for a long moment. ?But?what about Coach Lambert? I mean, she?s everywhere. She?s always giving interviews, posing for pictures when she?s out on the town. She doesn?t seem to have a problem with it.?

Shauna?s expression turned to one of deep sadness. ?That?s where you?re wrong, Cat. This shit is harder on her than on anyone I know. People think they know her, but nobody really does. Not down deep, not in here.? A long finger pointed to the center of Shauna?s chest. ?She?s so walled off that sometimes I?m scared for her, you know??

?I don?t understand,? Hodge replied, frustrated.

Shauna sighed. ?I know. And I?m not makin? it any easier. Why don?t I lay a little history on you. Maybe that?ll help.?

Hodge gave a grateful nod. ?Thank you.?

?Right before D hit the scene, the league was goin? down the tubes big time. The novelty of watching women jump around in tank tops was wearing off. People were complaining that the game was too slow, the scoring was too low, there was no offense, no defense, whatever. And then you had the gay thing.?

?Yeah,? Hodge replied, ?I remember hearing about that.?

?It hits most women?s sports sooner or later. We just got blasted especially hard. Folks stopped comin? to the games, stopped bringin? their kids, like they were gonna catch something. It just got outta control. Crash and burn time, baby.?

?And then along came the Goddess.?

?Exactly!? Shauna exclaimed, grinning. ?Here was this drop dead gorgeous hunk of womanflesh who could outshoot, outscore, outblock, outjam, and outrun anybody anywhere. And she was every man?s wet dream, in the flesh.? Keeps? mouth twisted, as if she?d bitten into a very bitter fruit. ?Too pretty to be a dyke, you know??

Hodge rolled her eyes in disgust.

?She didn?t care what they thought, though,? Shauna continued. ?She just wanted to play ball.?

?I bet they cared, though, right??

Shauna nodded. ?Right,? she bit off. ?They cared a lot. Especially when the stands started getting filled and the endorsement offers came rolling in. Seemed like everyone wanted D?s name on their product. Didn?t matter what it was, you know? As long as her name was on it, it sold.?

?And she liked the publicity??

?Hell no!? Shauna exclaimed, sitting bolt upright in her chair. ?She fucking hated it! But there really wasn?t anything she could do. Endorsement deals are part of the game, baby, and if you wanna play, you gotta pay.?

?Jesus. How did she handle it all??

?It was really hard, I know that. Hell, I have trouble coping, and I got nothing compared to her.?

?I think I?m beginning to see your point,? Hodge said finally.

Shauna grinned. ?Thought you would. More up there than just a pretty face, huh??

Hodge blushed and ducked her head. Keeps laughed.

?I?m still confused about one thing though.?

?Shoot,? Keeps invited, laughing a little at her unintentional pun.

?Well, you told me that in order to cope well, you need to keep your private life private.?

?Right.?

?But?for Dylan, it?s like you can?t turn on the television or open a magazine without seeing her out somewhere exotic with the stud of the month on her arm. So?how does that fit in with what you?re telling me??

?There?s actually a funny story about that,? Shauna replied.

?I?d like to hear it, if I could.?

Keeps shrugged. ?Don?t see why not.? She settled back, making herself more comfortable in the chair. Hodge followed suit. ?D was in the league only a month or two. Instant superstar, but nobody knew quite what to make of her, ya know? She?d give you an interview when you asked, but didn?t say nothing about herself. Then one day, she got a phone call from a friend of hers she grew up with. Thad Morgan.?

?The all pro quarterback? People?s Most Eligible Bachelor four years running? That Thad Morgan??

?That?s the dude. Anyway, he was headin? out to some awards banquet thing and he asked her to come along. She didn?t have anything else to do, so she went. Next day, every friggin paper in the country had her and Thad pasted across the sports pages, like they were one step away from shackin up!? Keeps paused in her story to laugh at the image. Hodge smiled politely as she waited for the emotions to pass.

?Sorry about that,? Shauna said finally, wiping tears of mirth from her eyes.

?That?s ok,? Hodge replied. ?So, the press jumped to the wrong conclusion. Did either of them correct the misconception??

?Nope.? Shauna grinned. ?In a way, it was perfect for both of them. See, when D went out, even to the damn store, she?d have to put up with getting hit on by every dude and his brother. Not many men are gonna tackle a chick whose got a boyfriend who could pull their nuts out through their throat, though. So it was all good.?

?Yeah, I can see the benefits of something like that.?

?As for Thad, well, aside from the fact that having D with him couldn?t do anything but improve his image, he had himself a little secret that being seen with D helped him to hide.?

Hodge thought about the cryptic remark for a moment. Then her eyes widened so much that Shauna thought they?d pop out of her skull and roll under the couch. ?Thad Morgan is gay?!??

Keeps cocked her head. ?You mean you didn?t know? Where?s your gaydar, girl??

Pinging off the screen anytime I?m within a hundred feet of Dylan Lambert. Hodge elected, however, to keep that particular thought to herself for the time being.

?That boy?s queerer than my mama?s frilly pink garter!?

?I never knew.?

?That?s cause he?s damn good at keeping his private life to himself. I mean, lesbians?in sports, it?s kinda expected, ya know? But if anyone ever found out that their macho man quarterback liked ham hocks better than oysters, well?.?

Hodge winced.

?You got that right, my friend. Anyway, the league about creamed itself over it They?ve finally got themselves the poster girl for clean heterosexual living. I heard the commissioner threw a big damn party for all the owners and they got wasted on champagne and fish eggs.?

?That is disgusting.?

Keeps sighed. ?I know. It sucks, don?t it??

?Royally.? Hodge looked up at her new friend, eyes bleak. ?I wish the world could be a place where stuff like that doesn?t matter anymore.?