"Not a chance," Crystal said. "You want to pretend nothing happened and she was mother of the year, go right ahead." "Look, I know you blame her for some of what happened to us but Crys, it was years ago."

"Oh, and that makes it all right?" Crystal walked over to her car and leaned against it, forcing Patty to follow her or have to speak loud enough for the words to carry through the open kitchen window. "She was all that stood between him and us and she did nothing, not one damn thing to help us."

"All right but he was the one, not her. You want to hate someone, hate him." Patty said angrily. "He's the one I hate."

"I hate him too but you can't just pretend she's innocent in all of it," Crystal said, her voice rising to match Patty's. "She's just as guilty and I can't figure out why the hell you can't see that." Pulling the keys out of her pocket, Crystal walked around the front of the car to the driver's side. "I'd like to see you and the kids," she said. "But I'm not going to put up with her."

"This is her home too," Patty said. "I can't just ask her to disappear whenever you want to stop over."

Jerking the door open, Crystal shrugged. "Fine. Then come over to my place because nothing is going to get me to make peace with her." She started the car and began backing up the second Patty moved away.

Speed was not a concern for Crystal as she whipped through the side streets on her way back to the highway. Once on the wide open road, she moved into the left lane and pushed the old car well over the posted limit. Only the rushing wind kept her thoughts company and it did nothing to help steer her away from the darkness that beckoned. At the intersection at the end of the exit ramp, Crystal came to a complete stop, the time having come for her to make a decision. To the right were the bars that offered oblivion, the escape from the anger and pain swirling around inside her. To the left, the scenic townhouse complex and Laura. Making her decision, Crystal turned the steering wheel and stepped on the gas.

Laura was waiting impatiently in the living room when she heard Crystal's car pull up. "It's about time," she said as she headed for the door, throwing it open just as Crystal was getting out of the car. "Where were you? I called around noon and Michael said you took the afternoon off."

"I went to see Jenny then over to Patty's," Crystal said, meeting Laura halfway up the walk. "And I'm not sure I should have done either." "What happened?"

Crystal sighed and leaned against her. "Long story, both of them."

"All right, let's go inside and you can tell me all about it," Laura said, putting her arm around Crystal's waist. "I'm sorry if I sounded agitated. It's not like you to leave work in the middle of the day."

"I couldn't concentrate at work," Crystal said as they entered the townhouse. "I thought if I talked it out with Jenny that I could make sense of it but that just added to the problem."

"Wait a minute, I'm confused. How did talking with Jenny make the problem you have with Patty worse?"

"Not that," Crystal said, tossing her keys on the side table. "Though in Doc's usual way she gave me a lot to think about." She shook her head. "I don't know how to explain it."

"How about if we go over to the couch and I hold you until you figure out a way?" Laura suggested, using her hands on Crystal's shoulders to guide her lover in the direction she wanted.

"Why is it everything in my life always ends up being so screwed up?" Crystal huffed as she flopped onto the couch. "It's like I have some sort of warped Midas touch or something."

Believing Crystal would explain in her own way, Laura sat down and began gently rubbing her back, patiently waiting out the long moments before the young woman spoke again.

"I went over to see Patty and we got into it over the old woman," Crystal sighed. "Again. I don't know why she even bothers trying. It's not going to change the way I feel. I told her from now on she should come over here with the kids instead of me going there."

"Did she agree with that?" Laura asked.

Crystal shrugged her shoulders. "I dunno. I was so pissed by then that I just jumped in the car and took off." She shook her head. "I guess Doc was right when she said that I was mad at Patty because she defends the old woman." She reached for her shirt pocket where the half-empty pack of cigarettes were. "I need a smoke," she said. "Can we go outside?"

"Sure," Laura said, standing up and reaching for Crystal's hand. Together they walked through the kitchen to the deck. They sat down on the chairs, Laura saying nothing while Crystal lit her cigarette and took several drags.

"I told Jenny about us," Crystal said, finally breaking the silence. She looked down at her hands. "She's not happy about it." "Why do you say that?" Laura asked.

"The way she reacted when I told her we're lovers." Crystal took a long drag. "Maybe you should talk to her."

Shifting her chair closer, Laura put her arm around Crystal and pressed her lips to the blonde forehead. "Was she mad about it?" "Not mad," Crystal said. "I think she was hurt."

"Oh." Laura said, rubbing her lover's back and trying to figure out how to handle this latest problem. While her breakup with Jenny had been extremely painful for both of them, she thought that was all in the past. "I'll talk to her if you want me to," she said, tracing the outline of Crystal's ear with her finger. "But I want you to know something." Tipping Crystal's face up to hers, Laura bent her head and brushed their lips together. "What Jenny and I had is in the past. We're close friends and hopefully will always be that way but we could never be lovers again. You're the one I want, the one I love." She saw the shadow of doubt still lingering in the soft blue eyes. "What is it?"

"What if Jenny wants you back?" Crystal asked in a small voice, letting her insecurities show. "You gotta admit, she's a better" "No," Laura said quickly, pressing her fingers to Crystal's lips. "Don't do that. I don't want Jenny back. I want you. If you believe nothing else, believe that. No matter what Jenny says or does, it's not going to change how I feel about you."

Minutes after Crystal left for work, Laura jumped into the Jeep and drove across town. As she had hoped, the orange Thing was still in its parking space when she pulled into Jenny's apartment complex. It was a meeting that Laura did not want to have but for Crystal's sake, one she knew she must. Hoping for the best, she walked to Jenny's door and knocked. Seconds later the door opened to reveal Jenny still in the sweatpants and tshirt she slept in.

"Morning," Jenny said, stepping back to let Laura inside. "What are you doing here?"

"We need to talk," Laura said.

"About?" Jenny said without enthusiasm as she gestured at the couch.

"You know what about," Laura said. "Crystal and I. I understand you weren't exactly happy about the news when she told you." "How I feel about it is irrelevant," Jenny said, crossing her arms and leaning against the low counter that separated the living room and kitchen. "Not when it affects Crystal," Laura said, leaning forward to rest her forearms on her knees. "She thinks you still have some feelings for me." Jenny raked her fingers through her short brown hair and turned away. "You don't want to go there, Laura," she warned. "Why?" Laura asked, though she suspected she knew what it was that had Jenny so riled up.

"Oh don't play that with me," Jenny snapped, raking her fingers through her hair. "How could you?"

Three years of living and loving the woman standing before her had taught Laura well and she knew that at this particular moment, she and Jenny were about to have quite an argument. "You make it sound like I defiled some virginal maiden," she said, crossing her arms over her chest and leaning back. "It was consensual."

"And you didn't do anything to encourage her just like that bitch in Colorado, right?" Jenny said, storming across the living room to the reproduction fireplace where a picture of her and Laura rested on the mantle. "Just another notch in your belt, right?"

"Crystal means more to me than that and you know it," Laura said defensively. "I love her."

"You told me you loved me once too," Jenny said, still staring at the picture and refusing to look at her ex-lover. "How long before you're sleeping around with some horny fan?"

"I won't," Laura said, rising to her feet.

"Like a promise of fidelity from you means anything," Jenny scoffed. "Or is that only promises you made to me?"

"What's this about, Jen? The fact that Crystal and I are lovers or that you and I aren't?" Laura asked. "I tried to get you back for almost four years and you shot me down each time. The best I could ever hope for was the occasional sleepover."

"How could I ever trust you again?" Jenny asked. "Do you think it was easy for me to walk out on three years of my life?" "It seemed easy enough from where I was standing," Laura said, trying hard to keep her voice from rising with the increased tension. She stood behind Jenny and put her hands on the therapist's shoulders. "I know it's my fault but it hurt like hell when you left," she admitted.

"Yeah well it hurt like hell when I came home to find that message on the answering machine too," Jenny said, shaking off the gentle hands and walking over to the couch.

"I know," Laura said quietly. Following Jenny's lead, she took a seat in the nearby chair. "Jen, this isn't the first time I've been with someone since we broke up. Why now?"

"You weren't serious about those other women," Jenny said. "You'd go out on a few dates, tell me all their shortcomings and why you couldn't possibly maintain any kind of a relationship with them, then move on to the next one."