“You can call Karl,” Hollis said and passed the baby boy to the waiting nurse. When she turned back, blood filled the uterus and poured over into the abdomen. The surgical field leapt into sharp focus, as if a color TV show had suddenly switched to black and white.

“We’ve got bleeding,” Hollis said. “Better get up another suction and start the Pitocin.” Sweat broke out on her brow and she blinked it away. “Kelly clamp.”

Someone wiped her face. The bleeding slowed but didn’t stop. “Load up the number two silks and have someone get her partner on the phone.”

“Do you want the hysterectomy tray, Hollis?” Sue asked.

Hollis looked up at the clock. “In a minute.”

*

At noon, Annie decided Hollis wasn’t going to call about meeting her for lunch before clinic. She was surprised. She’d known all along they were asking for trouble trying to build some kind of personal relationship—she hesitated to call it friendship, whatever lay between them had seemed from the onset to be something different—when they had to work together under such stressful, volatile conditions. But she’d assumed Hollis could handle it—just as she was handling it.

True, she’d had a lousy night’s sleep and been grumpy at breakfast. She’d just managed to put on enough of a smile to fool Callie, and fortunately all she’d had scheduled for the morning was paperwork. No one minded when she bitched about that. Now she sat at her desk watching the clock, giving Hollis another five minutes to call. Four minutes had passed when she finally rose, disgusted at herself for putting all the power in Hollis’s hands. She needed to be in clinic if she was going to make a decision that she hadn’t wanted to make in the first place, and she was damn well going to have the information she needed. She closed down her computer with a few sharp punches to the keyboard, snatched up her shoulder bag, and spun around, nearly colliding with Barb.

“Going to a fire?” Barbara asked with a faint smile.

“Something like that,” Annie muttered.

“Should I ask?”

“No,” Annie said with a sigh. “Nothing major, really. Just a slight miscalculation on my part, corrected now.”

Barb gave her an uh-huh look. “Okay. Whatever you say.”

“I’m going over to PMC for clinic. Unless something comes up, I won’t be back this afternoon.”

“No problem. Let’s get together the beginning of next week and talk about how this is going.”

“Sure,” Annie said.

“Don’t forget, if you’re running into roadblocks, I might be of help with that.”

“Nothing like that,” Annie said. “I’ll talk to you later.”

She hurried away, not in the mood to talk about Hollis. She definitely wasn’t going to tell Barbara about the tangle the two of them had created when both of them should’ve known better. Well, she couldn’t speak for Hollis, but she could certainly speak for herself.

She drove and parked in the hospital parking lot, thinking as she backed into a space of the morning she’d almost run over Hollis. Of the insolent way Hollis had planted herself in front of her car and refused to move until she’d gotten Annie to agree to have dinner with her. The way her deep blue eyes had sparkled with a touch of arrogance and a hell of a lot of charm. Did she have to be so good-looking? Did she have to be so damn nice? Annie switched off the engine and rolled down the windows, making the most of the halfhearted breeze. Hollis was charming. And Hollis hadn’t done anything she wouldn’t have done, given the circumstances. Hollis had suffered a terrible loss, and there was no statute of limitations on grief. Her pain had been palpable. So dense and fresh all she could think about was putting her arms around Hollis and holding her, getting between her and the memories that hurt her so much.

“As if I could,” Annie muttered. “As if she wanted me to.”

That’s really what had put her in such a bad mood—Hollis didn’t want her close. Perfectly understandable. She was the same way. So what was the problem?

“Absolutely nothing.”

Annie grabbed her keys, pulled her bag from the car, and locked up. Striding rapidly toward the hospital, she vowed that when she saw Hollis, she was going to act as if absolutely nothing had happened between them—because really, nothing had. They’d each shared a few things they probably wished they hadn’t, but that was over—in the past now. She could do this.

She got directions to the clinic from the guard at the door and found the clinic area a few minutes later. A pile of charts stood on a high counter and several pregnant women sat in a nearby waiting area watching television, corralling children, and talking amongst themselves. Annie glanced up and down the hall but didn’t see any sign of Hollis. A red-haired man in a lab coat and scrubs sat behind the counter making notes in a chart.

“Excuse me,” Annie said, “is Hollis Monroe here?”

“No, she’s held up with a patient. Can I help you?”

Annie tugged her lip with her teeth. No telling when Hollis would be back. “I’m not sure. I’m Annie Colfax, from the birthing center. I was supposed to see patients here with Hollis this afternoon.”

“Well,” he said, rising, “I’m Ned Williams.” He held out his hand, giving her a look as if he knew her. “One of the obstetricians in the group. I’m filling in for her this afternoon. You’re welcome to join me.”

“You wouldn’t mind?”

“No, not at all.”

“Okay,” Annie said, storing her bag underneath the counter. She followed Ned down the hall to the first room, where he passed her a chart and gave her a brief summary of the patient.

The afternoon passed quickly. Ned was friendly and informative, although he lacked the personal charm that allowed Hollis to have such instant rapport with her patients. And she really needed to stop thinking about Hollis. Close to five, she gathered her things and waited while Ned took a call. She heard him say, “Thanks, Hollis,” and she pretended not to notice her pulse jump.

“Thanks again, Ned.” She held out her hand. “This afternoon was great.”

“Glad to have you along.” Ned shook her hand and leaned on the counter. “I’ll tell Hollis you were here. She spent most of the afternoon in the OR with one of my moms in trouble. I definitely had the better day.”

“Thanks, but I imagine I’ll catch up with her tomorrow sometime.”

“Good enough. Have a nice night.”

“Yes,” Annie said absently, “you too.”

She glanced at her watch on her way out to the parking lot. Too late to do much cooking tonight. She needed to pick up Callie in twenty minutes. She wondered how long Hollis would be at the hospital. She wondered if she’d eaten.

“Hollis can take care of herself,” she muttered, unlocking the car. But she couldn’t forget the pain in Hollis’s eyes.

She slid into the car, pulled out her iPhone, and instructed Siri, “Find me the number for the restaurant Casa Ranchero.”

Chapter Twenty-one

Hollis walked out the emergency room doors and blinked at the brightness of the early evening sky. Somehow, the artificial lighting in the hospital never seemed as brilliant as daylight. Sometimes she would go twenty-four hours without seeing the sun, and the long days of summer were a bonus—it was almost six p.m. and the sun hadn’t yet set. She slowed just to feel the last warm rays on her face. The glass doors behind her whooshed open, and a group of nurses and techs came through, talking excitedly about weekend plans as they hurried past. She didn’t have any weekend plans. She didn’t have any plans at all.

She rarely gave any thought to how she would spend her free time. Until recently, she’d been perfectly content. Now she chafed, feeling aimless and untethered, as irritable as if she had an itch between her shoulder blades she couldn’t reach. When she contemplated the night ahead, the hours stretched endlessly. She was too keyed up to consider sleep anytime soon, too damn tired to think about cycling, and she couldn’t ride her motorcycle when she was this distracted. That left her without much in the way of options. She’d walked to work, so at least she’d have a few minutes to enjoy what was left of the day. She’d just grabbed jeans from her locker when she’d left the ICU and wore her scrub shirt for the short walk home.

“Hey, Hollis!”

Hollis turned and saw Honor. She slid her hands into the pockets of her jeans and waited for Honor to catch up. Her blond hair was loose and she carried a red nylon backpack over one shoulder. Dressed in beige pants, a pale yellow shirt with blue stripes, and running shoes, she could pass for one of the medical students.

“Hi,” Honor said. “I’m glad I saw you leaving. You walking home?”

“Yeah.”

“Mind company?” Honor asked, falling into step.

“No. Glad for it.”

Honor gave her a quizzical look. “Rough day?”

Hollis sighed. “Yeah, but nothing out of the ordinary. I’m just…” She shook her head. “Never mind. Just need to catch my second wind.”

“Well, if you’re not busy for dinner you can come on over to my place. Phyllis—my mother-in-law—always cooks enough for an army.”

“Oh, thanks. I appreciate it, but—”

“Some other time, then,” Honor said, saving Hollis the embarrassment of making a lame excuse.

“I’ll take you up on it,” Hollis said, surprised to realize she meant it. “Does Quinn’s mother live with you?”

“Quinn’s mother?” Honor hesitated. “Oh—Phyllis. She has the twin next door and pretty much keeps us all afloat. But she isn’t Quinn’s mother, she’s Terry’s, my first partner.”

“Oh.” Hollis flushed, hoping she hadn’t committed a faux pas. The few times she’d seen Quinn and Honor together, they’d looked as if they’d been together forever.

Honor must have read her mind. “Terry was killed about twelve years ago, when I was a resident.”