Джорджетт Хейер - Cotillion

She turned her face away, a blush of mortification spreading over her cheeks. “You mean that I am lacking in accomplishments.”

“Since my uncle neglected to provide masters to supply the deficiencies of your education, it must necessarily be so,” he replied calmly. “You know, my dear Kitty, how often I have recommended you to pursue your studies, even though you have left the schoolroom.”

“Yes,” acknowledged Kitty, without enthusiasm.

“It would afford me much pleasure to be able to direct your studies, and to read with you,” he said. “I believe I may say that I am accounted a good scholar, and I am very sure that to guide the taste and to enlarge the knowledge of so intelligent a pupil as you, dear cousin, must be an agreeable task.”

Lord Biddenden, who had been listening to his brother’s measured speeches in growing disapprobation, could no longer contain his impatience. “Well, really, Hugh!” he ejaculated. “A fine offer to be making the poor girl, I must say! Enough to set her against marriage with you from the outset!”

“Kitty understands me,” Hugh said, rather haughtily.

“Well, yes, I think I do,” said Kitty. “And George is perfectly right! I should dislike excessively to be turned into a scholar, and I cannot feel, Hugh, that I am at all the kind of girl you should marry. And now I come to think of it, I daresay there is one way in which I could earn my bread! I could seek a post as housekeeper. That is something in which I need no instruction. I have had the management of this house ever since I was sixteen, and able to relieve poor Fish of duties for which she is quite unsuited! I expect anyone would be very happy to employ me, too, because if there is one thing I know all about it is the strictest economy!”

“Now, Kitty, don’t talk nonsense!” begged Lord Biddenden testily.

The Rector made a silencing gesture with one shapely hand. “If your youth, Kitty, did not render you ineligible for such a post, your birth and your breeding most assuredly do. I hardly think, moreover, that you would find it congenial.”

“No, I shouldn’t,” she said frankly. “But I shouldn’t find it congenial to be married to you either, Hugh.”

“There! What did I tell you?” interpolated Biddenden.

“I am sorry,” Hugh said, grave but kind. “For my part, I should count myself happy to be able to call you my wife.”

“Well, it is very obliging of you to say so,” retorted Kitty, “but if you are speaking the truth I cannot conceive why you should never have given me the least suspicion of it until today!”

It was his turn to redden, but he did not allow his eyes to waver from hers, and he replied with scarcely a moment’s hesitation: “The thought, however, has frequently been in my mind. I believe it is not in my nature to fall in love, as the common phrase has it, but I have long felt for you the sincerest esteem and affection. You are young: you have not yet reached your twentieth birthday; I believed that the time to declare myself was not yet. I have sometimes suspected, too, that you had a partiality for another member of the family decided enough to make it useless for me to address you. It was in the expectation of finding all three of my cousins gathered here that I came to Arnside. I have found only Dolphinton, and in these circumstances I do not hesitate to beg you, Kitty, to accept of my hand in marriage, and to believe that at Garsfield Rectory you may be sure of a safe and an honourable asylum.”

“It is not, then, for the sake of Uncle Matthew’s fortune that you have offered for me, but from chivalry towards a penniless creature whom you suppose to have been rejected by—by everyone else?” demanded Kitty breathlessly. “I—I would rather marry Dolph!”

At these alarming words, Lord Dolphinton, who had for some time been sucking the hilt of a paper-knife, which he had found conveniently to hand, sat up with a jerk, and dropped the knife from his suddenly nerveless fingers. “Eh?” he uttered. “But—Said you wouldn’t! Remember it distinctly! Said I might be comfortable again!”

“And so you may, for I meant it!” said Kitty fiercely. “There is no one for whom I have the least partiality, and I don’t wish to marry anyone in your odious family! I think Hugh is a humbug, and Claud has a cruel nature, and Dolph and Freddy are just stupid, and as for Jack I am truly thankful that he was not coxcomb enough to come here, because I dislike him more than all the rest of you together! Goodnight!”

The door slammed behind her, causing Lord Dolphinton to start nervously. Biddenden said: “A ramshackle business you made of it, Hugh, with your damned, long-winded periods, and your fine talk of educating the girl! Much good will your scholarship do you while you have less than common sense! What in the devil’s name possessed you to bring Jack up? Of course she’s fancied herself in love with him for years!”

“It is time she left such childish folly behind her,” said Hugh coldly. “There can be little in Jack to recommend him to a female of sense and principles, after all.”

“If that’s what you think, my dear brother, I would advise you to put your nose outside your Rectory and to go about the world a little!” returned Biddenden, with a short laugh. “And don’t talk fustian to me about his gaming, and his libertine ways—ay, I know it’s on the tip of your tongue!—Jack may be anything you please but he’s a devilish handsome fellow, and an out-and-outer— what they call top-of-the-trees! Of course Kitty has a tendre for him!”

“No, she hasn’t,” interrupted Dolphinton, who had been following this interchange with a puzzled frown on his brow. “Can’t have been listening! She said she disliked him more than all the rest of us together. And come to think of it,” added his lordship, attacked by a sudden thought, “not sure she ain’t right!” He nodded, pleased with his flash of insight, and said with unimpaired affability: “Don’t see much of him, which accounts for my thinking it was you I disliked the most, George.”

Lord Biddenden, after glaring at him in an impotent way for several seconds, strode to the bell-rope, and jerked it vigorously. “Since that miserly old bag of bones has given no orders for our refreshment I shall make so bold as to tell the servant to bring some brandy to this room!” he announced bitterly.

Shortly before seven o’clock that evening, at about the moment when Miss Charing entered the Saloon to receive the proposals of two of her cousins, a hired post-chaise and pair drew up before the Blue Boar, a small but excellent hostelry situated rather more than a mile from Arnside House, where four roads joined. The young gentleman who alighted from the chaise must have been recognized at sight by the discerning as a Pink of the Ton, for although his judgment, which, in all matters of Fashion, was extremely nice, had forbidden him to travel into the country arrayed in the long-tailed coat of blue superfine, the pantaloons of delicate yellow, and the tasselled Hessian boots which marked him in the Metropolis as a veritable Tulip, or Bond Street Beau, none but a regular Dash, patronizing the most exclusive of tailors, could have presented himself in so exquisitely moulded a riding-coat, such peerless breeches, or such effulgent top-boots. The white tops of these, which incontrovertibly proclaimed his dandyism, were hidden by the folds of a very long and voluminous driving-coat, lined with silk, embellished with several shoulder-capes, and secured across his chest by a double row of very large buttons of mother of pearl. Upon his brown locks, carefully anointed with Russian oil, and cropped a la Titus, he wore a high-crowned beaver-hat, set at an exact angle between the rakish and the precise; on his hands were gloves of York tan; under one arm he carried a malacca cane. When he strolled into the inn, and shed the somewhat deceptive driving-coat, he was seen to be a slender young gentleman, of average height and graceful carriage. His countenance was un-arresting, but amiable; and a certain vagueness characterized his demeanour. When he relinquished his coat, his hat, his cane, and his gloves into the landlord’s hands, a slight look of anxiety was in his face, but as soon as a penetrating glance at the mirror had satisfied him that the high points of his shirt-collar were uncrumpled, and the intricacies of a virgin cravat no more disarranged than a touch would set to rights, the anxious look disappeared, and he was able to turn his attention to other matters.

The landlord, who had greeted him with a mixture of the deference due to a wealthy man of fashion, and the tolerant affection of one who, having been acquainted with him since the days when he wore nankeens and frilled shirts, knew all his failings, said for the second time: “Well, sir, this is a pleasant surprise, I’m sure! Quite a period it is since we’ve seen you in these parts! You’ll be on your way to Arnside, I don’t doubt.”

“Yes,” acknowledged the traveller. “Dashed nearly dished myself up, what’s more! Devilish early hours my great-uncle keeps, Pluckley. Fortunate thing: remembered it a mile back! Better dine here.”

The Blue Boar was not much in the habit of catering for the Polite World, but the landlord, secure in the knowledge that his helpmate, a north-country woman, was a notable housewife, received this announcement with unruffled equanimity. “Well, sir, I won’t say you’re wrong,” he remarked, with the wink of the privileged. “A most respected gentleman, Mr. Penicuik, I’m sure, but they do say as he don’t keep what I’d call a liberal table, nor, by what I hear from Mr. Stobhill, he don’t let the bottle go round like it should. Now, if you’ll step into the coffee-room, sir, you’ll find a good fire, and no one but yourself likely to come in. I’ll just make so bold as to fetch you in a glass of as soft a sherry as you’ll find this side of London-town, and while you’re drinking it my rib shall toss you up some mushroom fritters, by way of a relish—for you know we don’t have any call for French kickshawses here, not in the ordinary way, and aside from the fritters there’s only a serpent of mutton, and one of our goose-and-turkey pies, which I’ll be bound you’ve not forgot, and a bit of crimped cod, and a curd pudding, if you should fancy it.”