Джорджетт Хейер - Cotillion

“The reflection must be of comfort to all his friends,” said Lord Legerwood rather dryly. “May I know if they were all aware why they were sent for?”

“Dolph and Hugh seemed to know,” she answered. “But Freddy had not the smallest suspicion of it. I daresay, you know, that if my uncle wrote in veiled terms he might not have understood what was intended.”

“More than probable. But when the matter was made plain to him I collect that he was not backward in offering for your hand?”

“No, no, you must not be thinking that he offered for me because of the fortune!” Kitty said quickly. “I assure you, it is not the case at all! You must know that he—he had not previously supposed that his suit would be acceptable to Uncle Matthew!”

Lord Legerwood looked at her for a moment; then his gaze dropped to the snuff-box he held in one hand. He flicked it open, took a delicate pinch of snuff, and said smoothly: “The—er—attachment between you is of long standing, I apprehend?”

“Yes,” said Kitty, pleased to find him so quick-witted. “We—we have always felt a—a decided partiality for each other, sir. So when he found that Uncle Matthew had pledged himself to give me to whichever of them I chose he—he was emboldened to Speak!”

Lord Legerwood dusted his finger-tips with his handkerchief, and put away his snuff-box. “Really, a most romantic story,” he remarked. “I must own I had not thought it of Freddy. How little one knows of one’s offspring after all!”

She eyed him doubtfully, but was spared the necessity of answering him by the reappearance on the scene of her betrothed. Freddy came in with the news that his mother would in a few moments arrive to welcome her guest. He had prepared a glib speech assuring Kitty of Lady Legerwood’s pleasure in the visit, but under his father’s ironic gaze he faltered a little.

“Ah, Frederick!” said his lordship languidly. “I learn that I must offer you my felicitations.”

“Oh—er—exactly so, sir!” Freddy responded. “Thought you’d be pleased! Time I was getting married. Brought Kit up to town, you see. Felt you’d wish to become acquainted with her. Before we puff it off in the papers.”

“Oh, is the engagement not to be announced?” enquired his lordship, all polite interest.

“Uncle Matthew does not wish it to be announced quite immediately, sir,” said Kitty. “There—there are reasons why it will be more convenient to wait for a few weeks, but I cannot well enter into these!”

“No, of course you cannot,” said his lordship, as though he perfectly understood.

“Measles,” said Freddy. “Not that the old gentleman knew about that, but it’s a dashed good reason, come to think of it!”

Kitty looked at once anguished and bewildered, but Lord Legerwood seemed not to think the remark peculiar, agreeing, in the blandest way, that the measles afforded an excellent excuse for postponing the announcement of the engagement. Upon his wife’s entering the room just then, looking perfectly distracted, he instantly said: “Ah, my love, no doubt Frederick has broken these delightful tidings to you! You have come to welcome our prospective daughter-in-law!”

She cast him a puzzled, enquiring glance, but as his attitude clearly indicated his wish that she should receive Kitty with complaisance, and her own kindly disposition would have made it very hard for her to have repulsed the girl, she embraced Kitty, and said: “Yes, indeed! You must forgive me, if I seem surprised, my dear, for I had not the least suspicion, and—But you will explain it all to me presently! It is so unfortunate that you find us in such a fix, but you must come upstairs directly, and take off your bonnet, and be comfortable. Poor child, I am sure you must be tired and horribly chilled by the journey!”

She again looked for guidance towards her lord, but receiving nothing more helpful than one of his more enigmatic smiles took Kitty away to her dressing-room, murmuring quite audibly: “Oh, dear, I wonder what next will befall us?”

A silence followed the departure of the ladies. Freddy, quite as puzzled as his mama by Lord Legerwood’s behaviour, stole a cautious look at him, and waited.

“Quite a romance, Frederick,” said his lordship, drawing out his snuff-box again.

“No, no!” disclaimed his blushing son. He added hurriedly: “What I mean is, shouldn’t put it like that, myself!”

Lord Legerwood dipped his forefinger and thumb into the box, shook away all but a minute pinch of snuff and held this to one nostril. “It distresses me to reflect that you have been labouring under the pangs of what you believed to be a hopeless passion, and that I remained in ignorance of it,” he observed. “I must be a most unnatural parent. You must try to forgive me, Frederick!”

Thrown into acute discomfort, Freddy stuttered: “N—never thought of such a th-thing, sir! That is—n-not as bad as that! Always very fond of Kit, of course!”

Lord Legerwood, a sportsman and a gentleman, abandoned the pursuit of unworthy game, shut his snuff-box with a snap, restored it to his pocket, and said in quite another voice: “In Dun Territory, Freddy?”

“No!” declared his unhappy son.

“Don’t be a fool, boy! If you’ve steered your barque off Point Non-Plus, come to me for a tow, not to a chancy heiress!”

“It ain’t that at all!” protested Freddy, much harassed. “Mind, I knew that’s what everyone would think, and so I told Kit!”

“I perceive that I have fallen into vulgar error,” said his father. “Accept my apologies! I will refrain from embarrassing you with awkward questions, but may I know for how long I am to have the honour of entertaining Miss Charing? And even—if it is permissible to ask—what I am expected to do on her behalf?”

If there was a barb to this speech, it missed its mark. Relieved to find his parent in so forbearing a mood, Freddy replied gratefully: “Much obliged to you, sir! Never a dab at explaining things! Thing is, Kitty took a fancy to spend a month in London, and I promised she should. Thought m’mother would take her about. Pity I didn’t know about the measles! Makes it all dashed difficult.” He scratched his nose reflectively. “I shall have to hatch some scheme or other,” he decided.

“Do you think you will?” enquired Lord Legerwood, regarding him with a fascinated eye.

“Bound to!” said Freddy. “Well, what I mean is, must!”

It was fortunate for Miss Charing, who, from the moment of entering the Legerwood town-house, had been stricken by feelings of remorse, that her hostess was so much preoccupied with the thought of her ailing children that as soon as she had installed her young guest in a comfortable bedchamber, and had rapidly explained to her the unhappy state of affairs, she felt herself impelled to go up to the nursery-floor, to ascertain that no relapse had been suffered by any of the invalids, and that Nurse had not fallen asleep in her chair—a hideous dread which was as persistent as it was unjust. Miss Charing, left alone to the unaccustomed luxury of a fire in her bedchamber, and to the terrifying knowledge that she had but to pull the bell-rope to bring a handmaiden to her assistance, reviewed her situation with feelings of guilt. It had not previously occurred to her that the plot she had hatched might involve others besides the hapless Freddy. His parents, although known to her, had seemed to be but vague figures in the background, whose existence had no bearing upon her schemes. The entrance of Lord Legerwood into the Blue Saloon had banished such false notions; she had been within a hair’s breadth of abandoning her whole project. She was restrained partly by an agonizing reluctance to confess so foolish an exploit to such an awe-inspiring personage; and partly by an even more agonizing fear that to do so would mean her instant return to Arnside. By the time Lady Legerwood had joined the party, she had contrived in some measure to soothe her conscience with the reflection that since she had no intention of marrying Freddy no lasting harm would be done by the imposture. But for all that, she looked forward with dismay to the questions Lady Legerwood must inevitably ask, and could only be thankful that maternal solicitude obliged her ladyship to postpone the dangerous tête-à-tête.

Having assured herself that Edmund, though sadly feverish, seemed inclined to sleep, Lady Legerwood descended the stairs again to her dressing-room. Out of consideration for Miss Charing, whose wardrobe she knew to be scanty, she had declared that she would herself sit down to dinner in her morning-dress, but she would have thought it a very odd thing not to have made some alteration in her appearance. Not even her desire to seek counsel of her lord could be allowed to take precedence over the more pressing need to change her cap, and to repair possible damages to her complexion. She sent for her maid, discovered that her hair must be dressed again, and had just resigned herself to the impossibility of seeking his lordship out before the dinner-bell rang, when he most providentially walked into the room.

She greeted him with relief. “Oh, my love, I have been wanting to speak to you! Yes, the rose-point cap, Clara, and you need not wait! Stay, give me the orange-blossom scarf with the broad French border! No, perhaps that is a little too—The paisley shawl will do very well! You need not wait.”

“Charming!” remarked his lordship, picking up the lace cap, and looking at it through his eyeglass.

“Yes, is it not? I knew you would be pleased! Not that I care a fig for such fripperies at such a moment! How can you be so provoking, Legerwood? What, I ask you, is to be done? I was never more taken-aback in my life, and what must you do but stand there smiling as though you liked it!”