Maya Banks - Colters’ Gift

“Baby,” Liam said softly. “Listen to me, okay? I have so much to say right now and I’m fighting a hell of a lot of conflicting emotions, so be patient with me. The first thing you need to know is that I will never hurt you. Do you understand that? I don’t expect you to believe it right away, but I want you to file it away in your mind and I want you to pull it out every time you get afraid. I will never, ever, hurt you physically. I can’t promise that I won’t fuck up and hurt you emotionally. Believe me when I say it’s the very last thing I want to do, but I’m a guy, and we do stupid shit. We say stupid shit. I don’t always think before I speak. That’s going to happen, okay? But you have nothing to fear from me physically.” She gave a jerky nod.

“The second thing you need to know is that I don’t have a grand explanation for why you do it for me. But I knew from the moment I met you that I was gone in a pretty serious way. You were different from the other women I’ve been involved with. Not different in a bad way, but in a very, very good way. You filled the void that was left by my other relationships. I can only explain it by saying that it was like finding a missing piece to a puzzle. You fit. I hope to hell we fit. I hope this isn’t one-sided, and I’m willing to play a little dirty and try my best to convince you that I’m someone you need. I want you to depend on me, and not in a fucked-up way like Joel wanted you to depend on him. This isn’t about control. I just want you to know that you can count on me. For anything. And that good or bad, I’m in it for the long haul. I can’t be any more blunt than that.”

Noah remained silent, but his hold on her hand never loosened. He continued to press tiny kisses to her fingers, and he gradually opened her palm and pressed his mouth to her open hand.

“You reacted to my anger,” Liam continued. “I can’t promise never to get angry. It was like a kick in the balls to watch you with those big brown eyes look at me and ask why on earth I would want you, as if you were somehow unworthy. God, Lauren. Unworthy? Noah and I are just hoping like hell to prove ourselves worthy of you. I’m not mad at you, baby. I’m mad at the son of a bitch who has made you question yourself as a woman.”

Tears stung her eyelids, and she turned her head but found herself staring into Noah’s eyes. There was no escape from them.

Noah leaned forward and tenderly kissed the corner of her eye where a tear had escaped.

“Don’t cry, sweetheart. Liam’s usually not so damn eloquent, but in this case, I couldn’t have said it better myself. We want you to relax. It’s not going to be easy as we fumble and feel our way around a very delicate relationship. I have no experience in this kind of arrangement. Neither does Liam. We just both want to make you happy, and we want you to eventually be able to trust us. Everything else will work itself out. We’ll take it one step at a time and figure it out as we go.”

She nodded and then impulsively wrapped her arms around Noah’s neck, hugging him tightly.

Noah felt her go tense against him. She went so still, he was sure she was holding her breath. Waiting. For what? Did she expect a reprimand? Fuck that.

He wrapped his arms around her and hauled her into his lap, hugging her fiercely. He kissed the top of her silky hair and she gradually relaxed in his arms, melting sweetly against him.

“He never was affectionate with me,” she whispered. “I hated that. I hated what I became. I’ve always been a demonstrative person, and he took that away. He hated for me to touch him.”

Noah’s lips tightened as he met Liam’s surly gaze across the table. God, he wanted to kick Joel Knight’s ass. Men like him didn’t deserve to breathe.

Carefully he pulled Lauren away and pushed the hair from her face.

“You can touch me anytime you feel like it, sweetheart. I guarantee I won’t complain. And you can bet that I’m going to want to touch you often. I won’t be able to resist.”

“Come here, Lauren,” Liam said.

Noah kissed her temple and then helped her to her feet so she could walk around the table to Liam.

Liam opened his arms and she went willingly, and soon Liam had her nestled on his lap, his arms snugly around her. She cuddled into his embrace like a kitten seeking warmth, and Noah realized that what she needed most was comfort. She was starved for the things that most people took for granted. Affection. Tenderness.

Love.

“Anytime you want a hug, you come to me,” Liam said gruffly. “I’d happily spend all damn night holding you.”

“I’ll make mistakes,” Lauren said painfully. “I don’t know how to have a normal relationship, but I want to learn.”

“We’re going to make mistakes too, Lauren. We’ll just be patient with each other,” Noah said.

She straightened in Liam’s lap and looked directly into Noah’s eyes, her expression fierce and determined.

“I want this,” she said in a rush, almost as if she’d been afraid to admit it before. “I want it more than I can say. I’m just so afraid of screwing up.”

Noah’s heart melted. If there had been any lingering doubt on his part about the viability of entering a relationship that involved sharing a woman with his best friend, it was swiftly removed as he stared into Lauren’s eyes.

She was starkly vulnerable. She was afraid and she was still beaten down by a man whose hold on her had yet to be fully broken. But he saw hope in her eyes. He saw fierce determination to make things work between the three of them.

If she could take such a huge step and put her trust in him and Liam, then he could certainly do the same.

It was time to stop overthinking all the what-ifs and maybes and focus on the only thing he could control. His contribution.

“I want this too,” Noah said honestly.

There was relief in Liam’s eyes, and his hold tightened around Lauren.

Liam’s gaze met and held with Noah’s as silent understanding passed between them.

For better or worse, they were in this together.

WHEN Noah and Liam had inserted themselves into Lauren’s life—and apartment—they obviously hadn’t given a lot of thought to sleeping arrangements. The one bedroom was tiny, and Lauren had a daybed instead of a regular bed. There was barely room for the small chest of drawers she’d crammed into the room so she’d have a place for her clothing.