Nothing from Serenity until, Oh, all right. Whatever. I’ll stand down.

Swear on any possible future, no matter how slight, that Nathan Fillion could kiss you, the universe would take that opportunity away if you keep up with ANY of this. I pressed.

Yeesh, Inara, I said I’d stand down. Serenity evaded.

Swear. I demanded.

Nothing then, Fine. I swear on losing the opportunity to kiss Nathan Fillion that I’ll stand down.

I sighed with relief because that was so big it was huge but I typed. Thank you.

Is he there now? Benji asked.

Yes. I answered.

What’s he doing? Benji asked and I looked to the kitchen to see Chace was doing something at the counter.

Cooking dinner. I answered.

Sah-fraking-weet. Benji repled.

Pictures, sister, seriously. He’s yours, you’re tight, we want files. Serenity ordered.

I could do that.

So I replied. Okay but I have to go. I’m hungry and Chace might still be a little mad.

Go! Benji urged and finished on, Pictures!

Inara? Serenity on-line called.

Yes? I on-line answered.

Cool for you. I get you holding it close. But I’m really happy for you. Serenity typed.

Me too, darling. Benji added.

Thanks guys. I replied wishing one day I’d meet them at the same time knowing it was a high probability I wouldn’t which sucked because they were cool and really, when you got down to it, the best friends I ever had. So I finished with, Sorry I’ve not been around. I’ll keep in better touch.

Girl! Serenity shot back. Nathan was in my kitchen cooking dinner, I would NOT be on the computer talking to you.

This was true. She wouldn’t.

Friends fit in your life, Benji added. They don’t take away from you living it.

Seriously, really, I hoped one day I met these guys.

Love you guys. I told them

Right back at you. Serenity told me.

To the moon and back. Benji said.

I sighed.

Go to your guy. Serenity urged.

Okay, later guys. I agreed.

Later, Inara. Benji said.

Later, Faye. Serenity typed.

I closed the chat and went off-line without looking to see what went down when Chace impersonated me partly because I didn’t want to know and partly because it might make me mad and we’d had enough of that for one night. Then I made a mental note to reprogram my chat software so it didn’t log me in on startup.

Out of the corner of my eye, a glass of wine appeared with Chace’s fingers around the bowl. I watched him set it on my Wonder Woman coaster and then tipped my head back to look at him.

“Did they vow on Luke Skywalker’s light saber that they’d stand down?” he asked. I saw he was no longer pissed, there was a teasing light in his eyes but that didn’t mean he didn’t still look troubled.

“Something like that,” I mumbled, dropping my eyes and reaching for my wineglass.

I felt the tips of Chace’s fingers under my chin so I looked up at him again. The second I caught his eyes, he demanded softly, “Assure me they’re done.”

“They promised me they’re done,” I assured him just as softly.

“Okay,” he muttered, leaned in and touched his mouth to mine.

Then he straightened, turned and sauntered to the kitchen while I watched and sipped my wine.

He hit the kitchen and called, “Deal is, I bake the potatoes and broil the steaks. You twice bake the potatoes. Potatoes are baked, darlin’. You’re up.”

“Chace,” I called back.

He closed the fridge his head was in, came out with a beer and his eyes came to me. “Yeah?”

“Promise me you’ll never speak to me and scare me like that again no matter how pissed you are at me.”

I saw his beer disappear as both of his hands went behind the high counter that cut the kitchen from the other space but his eyes didn’t leave me when he ordered, “Come here, Faye.”

“Promise me,” I pushed.

“Baby, come here,” he called gently.

My body started to move but my mind shut it down and I repeated, “Promise.”

He held my gaze and I let him.

Then he spoke.

“You fucked up, Faye,” he told me, still talking gently but loud enough for me to hear across the apartment.

“I know,” I agreed.

“He raped her face. I’m not a woman, I can’t call it but I’m guessin’ that isn’t much better than violating other parts of her.”

I was a woman but I luckily didn’t know either. That said, my guess, it wasn’t.

“I didn’t know that,” I reminded him.

“You knew she was dead,” he returned.

I did know that.

I remained silent because he had a point. But I stayed where I was because I felt I did too.

We held each other’s eyes in silence and this lasted a long time before Chace ended it.

“Never hurt you.” His voice was soft but firm. A vow.

“You scared me,” I told him.

“No, honey, you scared me.”

“What?” I whispered but he heard it because he answered.

“Anything happened to you, I don’t know what I’d do.”

“Chace –”

“You in my life, me livin’ in hell, feels like I’ve been touched by an angel.”

I stopped breathing.

Was he serious?

“Anything happened to you, I don’t know what I’d do,” he repeated.

He was serious.

I forced air in my lungs.

Chace kept talking.

“See them in my head, her footprints in the dirt on the trail. She was wearin’ heels. She stumbled. She fell. He drove her on. Her knee prints in the clearing where he violated her. They were yours, those were your last moments, no drama, no joke, I’d lose my mind.”

“It haunts you,” I said softly but he again heard me.

“Damn straight. I didn’t want her but that didn’t make her not mine.”

Oh God, Laurie was right.

I stood and reminded him, “You didn’t kill her, Chace.”

“I didn’t protect her either.”

Oh God. Laurie was so right.

“Has it occurred to you that you couldn’t even if you tried?” I asked.

“Yeah, Faye, but I also didn’t try,” he answered instantly.

Oh God.

I reminded him of something else. “She trapped you into marriage.”

“That make it okay she died that way?” he asked swiftly.

“Of course not,” I answered just as swiftly.

He studied me a moment before asking, “You’re so okay with Misty gettin’ done the way she did and me holdin’ no responsibility for that, why are you so far away?”

At that, I moved to him, I did it quickly, setting my wineglass on the counter as I rounded it and went right to him. He turned to me as I got close and I fitted my front to him, rested my hands on his chest and tipped my head back to look right in his eyes.

“I suppose,” I began to give in, “since I’m not doing anything else as stupid as being the de facto ringleader of a band of amateur computer sleuths, I won’t have to be worried you’ll get that pissed at me again so I also suppose this conversation is moot.”

He lifted a hand, slid my hair off my shoulder than wrapped his fingers around the side of my neck, his other hand still curled around his beer on the counter and his lips twitching as he noted, “Bet I’m the only man banging a woman in Carnal who uses the words ‘de facto’.”

“This is likely,” I murmured and his fingers at my neck gave me a squeeze.

His voice was low and serious when he ordered, “You forget what you know about those men, who they are, whatever they uncovered and shared with you.”

I nodded.

“You tell anyone about that shit?”

I shook my head.

“Think hard, Faye. Lexie? Lauren? Even Twyla?”

I kept shaking my head and whispered, “No, Chace. No one. I even lied to Krys, Lexie and Lauren when I let it slip about going to Harker’s Wood and I never lie. Or um, I very rarely lie.” God! No more lying! “No one knows,” I concluded.

“Right,” he muttered.

I took in a breath then I leaned deeper into him and asked quietly, “How do I help you let go the responsibility you feel for what happened to Misty?”

“Don’t get dead like her,” he replied immediately.

“Okay,” I whispered hoping a frak of a lot I managed that then went on, “But other than that.”

His eyes moved over my face as his hand slid up to my jaw then his thumb slid over my lips before going back and he answered, “No fuckin’ clue, baby.”

I was still whispering when I told him, “I hate that happened to her.”

“Me too,” he whispered back.

“I don’t know what happened but maybe, if she was playing with fire, with Arnold Fuller, what she did with Ty, maybe it was her who got herself burned.”

Chace pulled in a breath.

Then he admitted softly, “She was playin’ with fire.”

There it was. A little of his “dark”. Not much but a little. Thank God.

“She didn’t deserve it but it isn’t your fault,” I told him softly.

“Okay, Faye.”

“Seriously, Chace.”

He dipped his face close to mine and he whispered, “Okay, Faye. Seriously. You’re right and you don’t even know how right you are. She got messed up with people she thought she could play, she made her deal, didn’t get out of it what she wanted, rethought things and the people she’d fucked along the way and wanted to do right. They knew she was wavering. They took her out. Lucky for Ty, she wavered and fell the right way before they gave her the ultimate fuck in more ways than one. So yeah, they could have done her in my house and they’d have found a way to do it without me bein’ able to stop it. Okay. I’ll work on lettin’ it go. Now can you smush up the fuckin’ potatoes and add shit that makes it taste good so we can eat before you go to bed at midnight?”