“We blew it,” he whispered bitterly.

But would she be saying that if she knew how he really felt? Would she be so quick to dismiss any further chance if he told her?

He sat up, his head spinning a little, and he laughed stupidly then immediately frowned. How the hell was he supposed to tell her now when he had to sneak around and follow her like a creeper just to have a conversation with her? Even she had cut him short the other day at the beach.

Flinging the pocket knife he’d been flipping open and shut across the room, he stood up. Life sucked! Out of nowhere, Sal’s words suddenly slammed into him. Stay the fuck away from Sofie, or I’m coming after you personally.

“Fuck no!” He took another swig of from the near empty bottle. “No, Sal. I won’t stay away from her, not until I tell her how I feel!”

He set the bottle down on his desk and charged out the door. The entire hallway moved from side to side as he walked through it.

“Where are you going?” His mother’s anxious eyes searched his.

“To see a friend,” he said, walking past her.

“Brandon, you’re drunk!”

For some reason that made him laugh. “Yeah, I guess I am.”

“You shouldn’t go out like this.” His mother warned.

“Don’t worry. I’m not driving,” he said as he pushed through the front door.

The cool fresh air hit him like smelling salts, and he shook his head. Until that moment, he hadn’t realized how buzzed he really was. Even drunk he knew this was a bad idea, but he continued his long strides with even more conviction. The entire cul-de-sac where Sofie lived was packed with cars. Of course, he expected nothing less. At every party her family had ever had, they’d had a ton of people. A New Year’s party for them would be huge.

There were a few men just outside her front door as he walked up the circular driveway. He recognized Sarah, Sofie’s brother Angel’s girl, tying balloons around the mailbox out front, so he approached her.

“S-sarah.”

She turned, and he actually saw the color in her green eyes pale. “Brandon?”

“Can you get S-sofie for me? I need to talk to her.”

She shook her head. “She’s not here.” Turning to the front door, she glanced back at Brandon, quickly lowering her voice. “You shouldn’t be here, Brandon.”

He knew this wouldn’t be easy, but he was determined. “I know she’s here.” His struggle to keep from slurring was pissing him off. “You guys are having a party. Where else would she be? Can you . . .? Can you just get her for me? I—” The sidewalk suddenly shifted underneath his feet, and he stumbled sideways but recovered quickly. “I need to talk to her before I leave.”

“I’m telling you the truth. She’s at the restaurant.” She gasped, looking behind him. Just as he turned, he saw Angel turn back toward the garage. “He almost saw you. You better go. I’m serious. They’re all here, and they do not want you around Sofia.”

“I’m not leaving until I talk to her.” Sarah’s eyes opened wide, and she shook her head. “They can’t do this, Sarah. When I leave, it’s forever. There are some things I need to say to her first.”

Her eyes looked even more anxious now, and she continued to speak in her lowered voice. “This is so not the time or place—”

The front door slamming against the wall as it was pushed open made Sarah flinch and got their attention. As usual, Sofie’s hotheaded brother Alex looked incensed as he charged down the porch steps. “Why the fuck are you here, Billings?” he demanded, his hands already fisted at his sides.

Brandon stood his ground. He was sure it was the alcohol, but seeing her larger-than-life raging brother charge toward him with no hesitation and knowing that he’d no doubt be in a world of pain soon didn’t stop him from speaking up. “I wanna to talk to S-Sofie.”

“You’re out of your mind!” Alex sped up.

Brandon shook his head. “I won’t leave until—”

Alex’s fist hit him just under the eye, and he stumbled back. “You won’t leave?” Alex roared as he landed another fist to Brandon’s mouth, making him fall back onto the hood of the parked car just in front of Sofie’s house. “You think I’m letting you anywhere near my sister, asshole?”

Brandon blinked, shaking his head again. He’d always thought the expression “seeing stars” was just that, an expression. But he was literally seeing stars or bright specs flashing as he continued to shake his head again, blinking as he tried to clear his sudden double vision. Just as his vision was coming together and he could see straight, he noticed the amount of people who’d poured out of Sofie’s house. Sal, Angel, and some of the other men who were out there now held Alex back, but he could see it was a struggle.

“Get out of here, Brandon!” Sal yelled as Alex nearly came loose.

Even with the metallic-like taste of blood in his mouth, Brandon knew he was asking for it by staying, but he wasn’t leaving, not until he got his chance to talk to her. “I won’t leave!” he yelled, holding himself up against the car. “I wanna see Sofie!” He slurred, pounding on the hood of the car and pointed at the house. “Get her out here!” He turned up to the window on the second floor he knew was hers. “S-sofie!”

Alex came loose suddenly, and Brandon heard Alex’s mom cry out.

“Lo va a matar!”she shrieked. “Paren lo!”

“God damn it, Alex!” Sal reached out for Alex with both hands. “He’s not worth it!”

Alex grabbed Brandon by the throat, squeezing so hard Brandon’s ability to breathe was instantly blocked.

“She’s damn right. I am gonna kill him!” Alex growled as he slammed Brandon down against the car.

Between Sal, Angel, and several of the other men there, they finally pulled Alex off Brandon, and he held on to the car for dear life, gasping for air.

“Ya pues, hijo! Calmado!” Alex’s dad tried in vain to calm him as they all held him back.

As Brandon continued to gasp and cough, he looked up at Alex. “H-hit me.” He gasped. “Hit me all you want!”

“You see. He wants me to!” Alex yelled, trying to get loose as they pulled him further away.

“I won’t leave until I talk to her,” Brandon said, rubbing his neck.

This time he said it with a little less conviction because he was beginning to feel as if he might pass out. Sal said something to Sarah, who rushed into the house.

The hope that maybe Sal had told Sarah to go get Sofie was squashed with the next words out of Sal’s mouth. “It’s not happening. Look around, Brandon.” Sal pointed at his brothers and everyone else out there. “Do you really think you’re gonna get to talk to her?”

“Like hell he is,” Alex yelled.

Brandon glanced around. It wasn’t just Sofia’s family out there anymore. Everyone who lived in her cul-de-sac was out in their front yards, watching the spectacle. Then he looked up the street and saw his mom standing there in tears with her hand over her mouth. Brandon’s shoulders slumped in defeat. As much as he felt like looking Sal in the eyes and telling him that he would talk to Sofie before he left, he wouldn’t give Sal another reason to make his mom cry.

Even as calm as Sal was acting compared to Alex and as drunk as Brandon still felt, he’d sobered up enough to know saying something like that to him right now would land another fist on his already aching face. Some of the other guys in her family looked as if they were being held back now too. Brandon couldn’t care less about the physical pain. If his mother weren’t standing there, he’d gladly get pummeled just for the satisfaction of being able to tell all these fuckers he wasn’t giving up.

Pushing himself away from the car, he stumbled on his first steps.

“Brandon,” Sal said as he walked by him, his voice slightly lower and calmer now. Brandon didn’t turn to him, but he did stop. “Do not come back. You hear me? Stay the hell away from Sofia if you know what’s best for you.”

With a humorless chuckle, Brandon continued to walk but said nothing. Both Angel and Alex yelled out similar threats, but Brandon was done listening. They couldn’t keep him from her forever.

Chapter Two

Waiting by the pharmacy for his dad’s meds, Brandon stood there, feeling numb. When he’d taken the emergency leave to come home, he’d known his dad was bad, but he had no idea things had progressed this much.

His parents hadn’t even realized it either. When they put the house up for sale, the plan was they’d all move to Georgia together. Using the money they got from their astronomically-priced California home, Brandon would buy a house in Georgia with cash. His mother would live off whatever was left from the sale and his dad’s pension. Considering the home prices in Georgia, there’d be plenty of money left over. Now his dad’s condition had taken such a turn the doctors said he was too ill to travel. The meds Brandon was picking up for him today were the last he’d ever pick up from a pharmacy for him because in a few days his dad would be admitted to a hospice where he’d live out the rest of what was left of his life.

Brandon wouldn’t even be there, since there was no way to know how long for sure his dad would be around and his leave was only temporary. Already strings had to be pulled to get a leave during the holidays on such short notice.

His reaction to seeing his dad’s condition decline so rapidly was not what he had expected. Brandon was certain he’d never felt his heart so heavy, not even through all he’d been through as a child. He’d always been able to just hold it all in and suck it up for his mom’s sake. She was going through enough as it was. She didn’t need to be brought down any lower by seeing his pain and fear.