Fr: Jen Sadler <jennifer.sadler@thenyjournal.com>

Re: You

No, you should not have stayed in Kentucky. If you had stayed in Kentucky, you never would have stopped wearing blue eyeshadow. Seriously, Kate, it was not a good look for you.

Also . . . you might never have met Mitch.

Kate, I know you might not believe this, but the guy was really hurting last night. He feels TERRIBLE about what happened with you and Amy. I really don’t think he saw it coming. I don’t know what exactly went down at the deposition—he told me a little about it—but his intention was NEVER to get you fired. I really think he’s on our side in all of this, Kate. I think he wanted to help get Mrs. Lopez’s job back . . . because he thought that’s what YOU wanted.

I think he also wanted to make Amy look like a liar, but whatever, that one backfired pretty badly, too.

I know you probably don’t feel too forgiving right now, but really, I think the guy meant well. And he didn’t even blink about his shoes. Yourbarf isn’t even gross to him. That has to mean something.

You know what he does, to stay in such great shape? Mitch, I mean? He volunteers at the Y. That’s how he got all those muscles you told me about. He plays wheelchair basketball. With paralyzed guys, you know?

Would a guy like that REALLY purposefully try to make a girl lose her job? No.

Now snap out of it. We’re going to get your job back. I promise.

And call the guy and say you’ll go to dinner with him.

J


To: Jen Sadler <jennifer.sadler@thenyjournal.com>

Fr: Kate Mackenzie <katydid@freemail.com>

Re: Me

Are you HIGH???? I’m not going to have dinner with Mitch Hertzog. Even if it is true about the wheelchair basketball. Or are you just saying that to get me to like him? Because if I find out it’s not true . . .

Not that it matters. THE GUY GOT ME FIRED, JEN.

And okay, maybe you’re right, and he didn’t mean it, and genuinely feels bad about it. But the fact is, I DON’T HAVE A JOB. Or a PERMANENT ADDRESS. Or . . . ANYTHING.

So even if he DOES like me and my barf, what do I have to bring to the relationship? Yeah, that’d be a big zero.

So what’s the point of having dinner with him? Because what would a totally PERFECT, WHEELCHAIR-BASKETBALL-PLAYING GUY LIKE THAT EVER SEE IN A JOBLESS REJECT LIKE ME????

Going to put my head in the oven.

Kate


To: Kate Mackenzie <katydid@freemail.com>

Fr: Jen Sadler <jennifer.sadler@thenyjournal.com>

Re: You

Fwd: l Say it isn’t so! l Kate l Kate

Well, before you kill yourself, check out these e-mails from your personnel. Do these sound like they’re from people who think you’re a reject? DO THEY?


Fwd: <katydid@freemail.com>

To: Jen Sadler <jennifer.sadler@thenyjournal.com>

Fr: Nadine Wilcock-Salerno <nadine.salerno@thenyjournal.com>

Re: Say it isn’t so!

Is it really true? Kate got the axe? But WHY? She was the nicest personnel rep this stupid company ever had (present company excluded, of course)!

This REEKS of Amy Jenkins. Is she behind this? I knew that bitch was up to something the other day in the staff dining room, when I saw her actually lift a piece of buttered bread to her lips. I haven’t seen her go off Atkins in two years . . . I should have known she was celebrating.

What can I do to help get Kate back? Because if Amy thinks we’re lying down for this one, she’s high. She can tell us to be sweeties and wipe the seaties, and she can take away our Dessert Lady. But she can’t fire Kate and get away with it. No way.

Nad:-(


Fwd: l <katydid@freemail.com>

To: Jen Sadler <jennifer.sadler@thenyjournal.com>

Fr: Mel Fuller-Trent <melissa.trent@trentcapital.com>

Re: Kate

Oh my God! Is it really true? Amy fired Kate? Why? Not for tardiness, I hope.

Jen, this is awful. Kate was SO nice to me when they were giving me that grief about going part-time. We have to DO something! What can I do? The Trents love holding benefits. Can we hold a benefit? For Kate? Just let me know, PLEASE!!!!

Mel


Fwd:<katydid@freemail.com>

To: Jen Sadler <Jennifer.sadler@thenyjournal.com>

Fr: Tim Grabowski <timothy.grabowski@thenyjournal.com>

Re: Kate

I just heard. This means war. The T.O.D.’s aware of that, isn’t she? That in firing Kate, she’s alienating the entire Tech Dept? Because there isn’t a guy here who wouldn’t walk over hot coals for Kate. She’s the only one in that damn office (not including you, Jen) who treated us computer guys with anything remotely resembling respect. Not to mention compassion.

And she used to come to ourFarscape marathon parties, too.

What can we do to get her back? Just let us know, and it’s done.

Tim


To: Kate Mackenzie <katydid@freemail.com>

Fr: Jen Sadler <jennifer.sadler@thenyjournal.com>

Re: You

Do those sound like e-mails from people who are happy to see you go? No, they don’t. People here like you, Kate. MITCH likes you, too, barf on his shoes or not. Now cheer up.

Besides, you can’t put your head in Dolly’s oven, I just checked with her, and it’s electric. The worst that can happen is that you’ll bake yourself.

J


To: Jen Sadler <jennifer.sadler@thenyjournal.com>

Fr: Kate Mackenzie <katydid@freemail.com>

Re: Me

Thanks for the e-mails. I guess they made me feel better. A little.

I’m going out to buy a paper. I need to start looking for a new job. Not to mention a new apartment. But first things first.

Did I mention I hate everyone in the whole universe? Present company excluded, of course.

Kate

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I can’t believe I went to college so I could file.

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Great. The only way I’d qualify for this one is if I turn into a she-male.

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Food service. Might as well move back to Kentucky and ask if I can have my old job at Rax Roast Beef.

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Ha! I WISH!


To: Jen Sadler <jennifer.sadler@thenyjournal.com>

Fr: Mitchell Hertzog <mitchell.hertzog@hwd.com>

Re: Kate

Hi, Jen. I tried to call, but all I got was your voice mail.

Have you heard from Kate this morning? How’s she doing? I e-mailed her, but I haven’t heard back.

Let me know if you’ve heard anything.

Mitch


To: Mitchell Hertzog <mitchell.hertzog@hwd.com>

Fr: Jen Sadler <jennifer.sadler@thenyjournal.com>

Re: Kate

She’s fine. Ornery, but fine.

I don’t think it will come as too much of a shock to you if I tell you that you are not one of her favorite people this morning, either. She doesn’t seem to remember too much about what happened last night. How are your shoes, anyway?

J



To: Jen Sadler <jennifer.sadler@thenyjournal.com>

Fr: Mitchell Hertzog <mitchell.hertzog@hwd.com>

Re: Kate

My shoes are fine. And it’s great to hear that Kate’s all right. Not so great, you know, that she hates my guts, but I can’t say I blame her.

Listen, do you have access to Kate’s computer at work? I was wondering if you’d be willing to commit a little white-collar crime for me. Nothing major, just check Kate’s e-mail IN box and see if that note from Amy Jenkins—the one telling Kate to quit writing the warning letter to Ida Lopez—is still there. Could you do that for me, and let me know? I’d appreciate it.

Mitch


To: Mitchell Hertzog <mitchell.hertzog@hwd.com>

Fr: Jen Sadler <jennifer.sadler@thenyjournal.com>

Re: Kate

Sorry to be the one to break it to you, but Kate’s workstation has been cleared, and her computer’s hard drive replaced. Amy got in here first thing after lunch yesterday and made sure the place was denuded of any sign that Kate Mackenzie ever worked here. Her files have been confiscated as well. My guess is, they’ve already met their fate with the office shredder. Amy is pretty thorough in her ruthless quest for total domination over the HR division of this company.