But I needed to say it to Cain first. And now wasn't the right time. I needed to let him know that, although I loved him—and Eli too for that matter, I wasn't going to be the person who came between them.

We busied ourselves in the kitchen later, getting our Christmas ham in the oven. I watched the way that Eli and Cain interacted and it seemed different—not a bad different, just a subtle quietness that blanketed them and it was new. It was as if a decision had been made; or maybe, a compromise of some sort between the two of them. I was unnerved by it, somehow feeling guilty of something.

I couldn't stop thinking about the conversation I'd overheard and now I wished like hell that I hadn't. And even though they had no clue that I'd heard it, it still hung like a pall over all of us.

Once everything was in the oven, I gathered up all of the boxes containing my Christmas haul, and headed to my room to start putting things in order. Dinner wasn't going to be ready for a couple of hours and I needed some alone time. I sensed they might need some as well.

I'd gotten everything put away in my closet and had made up my bed when there was a light tapping on my door.

"Paige?" It was Cain. "Can I come in?"

"Sure," I called out, plopping down on top of my bed, drawing my knees up under my chin.

He came in, closing my door softly behind him.

"You okay?" he asked, studying me carefully.

"Sure," I said, with faux sincerity. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"No reason. You just seem kind of quiet all of a sudden. Got the Christmas letdown?"

"What's that?" I asked, blinking in confusion.

He smiled. "You know, after the six week build-up and all of the anticipation that goes with it…Then on Christmas, the gifts are opened up and the mystery is gone and it kind of sucks the air out of all that build-up once you realize that it's over for another year."

I smiled weakly. "It's not that. I mean my Christmas was awesome and all. It's something else."

"Wanna share?"

I shifted nervously. "Actually, I was in your room yesterday when you guys got back from Darcy's," I said. "I was looking for boxes to wrap your gifts, and I…kind of panicked when I heard you come home, because I know you don't like me messing with your stuff…so, I uh…hid in the closet," I mumbled, feeling my face flush with embarrassment.

"Go on," Cain urged.

"Okay, so I heard the conversation you had…about me; and how you both feel about…me, and it just sort of seemed…to me that maybe Eli was giving you some kind of permission, you know, to act on it…and, well—I don't know how to feel about that," I finished, finally allowing a sigh to escape.

Cain was still studying me…intently. My admission hadn't seemed to have caught him off-guard, or evoked any major change in his demeanor.

"Paige," he finally said, "You can't pretend that you didn't already know how I've felt about you for a while now. I mean, I think it's been fairly obvious…to the both of us. And I think you reciprocate those feelings, too."

I rested my chin on my knees, and rocked back and forth on the bed slowly. "It doesn't mean that it's right," I whispered. "So, yeah, maybe I have been crushing on you…big time. But you belong to Eli and I know my boundaries these days—I mean, in case you haven't noticed, I'm not the same skank you first met last May, right?"

His face softened; the corners of his mouth curled up into one of his magnificent, though rare, smiles. "I have," he replied, softly. "We both have and we love it. And you're right, baby. I belong to Eli, and he belongs to me, but I want you to belong to me, too. In every sense of the word. And Eli understands that about me and about you. He loves us both, you know?"

I shook my head back and forth. "I know he does," I squeaked, my voice full of emotion. "And it's because I love Eli that I would never feel right about…encroaching. I mean, how in the hell could that ever work, Cain?"

He pulled me from my sitting position, into his strong arms, and I let him. His hand brushed my hair back from my face, and his fingers tilted my chin upward, so that I was forced to look into his beautiful russet eyes.

"We'll just take it slow, baby," he whispered. "Because I have no intention of losing either one of you, got it?"

I didn't have a chance to nod, but I knew that I would have because I had no intention of leaving these men either.

Cain's lips claimed mine with purposeful intent, and I melted into him, responding with my own purpose to claim him right back. My tongue explored him, tasted him, and matched his every movement as my hands fisted through his thick, dark hair, pulling him into me with a hunger I didn't realize existed.

We stayed locked within one another's arms until I felt dizzy with the need for more, and if we didn't stop soon, there would be no stopping. Cain sensed it, too.

He pulled away, cupping my chin and planting, soft kisses on my lips, his eyes smoldering. "We’ll take it slow and easy, babe."

I nodded. He pulled away and stood up. I could see that he'd grown hard…for me.

"Eli's leaving in the morning on a ski trip for the next couple of days with some buddies from work. One of them has a condo somewhere in the Shenandoah Valley."

"You aren't going?"

"Have some catering to do. Eli's company shuts down between Christmas and New Year's. I guess it'll just be you and me for the next few days."

I felt myself shiver inwardly, nodding again. And then he was gone. Leaving me there to contemplate what he'd just told me.

chapter 15

Eli had left for his ski trip before I'd gotten out of bed the following morning. Of course, I'd been awake for a couple of hours. I was just too much of a damned coward to leave my room until I knew that I had the house to myself.

It was Saturday, so I didn't have to report back to work until Monday.

Cain had also left, leaving a note for me on the counter telling me that he'd be back before dinnertime, and making a point of letting me know that we would be having dinner together.

I busied myself doing domestic things, and trying not to think about this evening, when it would be just Cain and me. My stomach butterflies swarmed at the possibilities my imagination was churning out.

Eli hadn't mentioned anything before Christmas about a planned ski trip. This was so not like him. I mean, he’d plan his wardrobe in advance for an excursion such as this to ensure that his ski wear was coordinated perfectly.

This had been a last-minute decision; I knew that now. Eli was giving Cain and me time alone. On purpose.

But why?

Wasn't it obvious?

He loved Cain that much.

Maybe he loved me that much, too.

My heart was racing; jumbled thoughts were running through my head. I didn't think that I'd ever been this nervous—or excited.

I finished up with the house, and then took some steaks out of the freezer for dinner.

I took a leisurely bath, shaving, waxing and buffing my skin to a healthy glow.

I painted my nails, and selected some sexy new underwear that I had purchased as a Christmas gift to myself. I dressed in a pair of my new skinny jeans and one of the sweaters I’d received from Eli and Cain.

I brushed out my damp hair, blowing it dry and straightening it with my flat iron. Once I had applied a bit of bronzer and eye make-up, I studied my reflection in the mirror.

I knew what was going to happen this evening and for now, I was okay with that, because I knew in my heart, that it was what I wanted and what I needed.

* * *

I was in the kitchen, marinating the steaks and putting a salad together when Cain got home. It was damn near seven o'clock and I could tell that it had been a day for him. He came up behind me and my skin immediately goose-bumped hard.

"I was going to take you out," he said to me softly, his breath warm on the back of my neck. "Today's event was one disaster after another, it seems. I meant to call you before I realized how late it was. Sorry, baby."

"It's fine," I said, not daring to look at him while I continued chopping celery for the salad. "Let's stay in and have a quiet dinner."

"I'm gonna grab a quick shower, then I'll be out to help you, I promise."

"No, Cain. You worked today. I've got this, okay?"

He put his arms around me, and kissed the top of my head gently. "I won't be long," he said with a promise in his voice.

I shivered.

Dinner was quiet and intimate. The two glasses of wine I consumed had taken the edge off, and maybe had even served to give me some courage. We needed to deal with the elephant in the room before anything else progressed.

"So, have you talked to Eli today?" I asked, looking up from my plate.

"No," he answered quietly. "I don't expect to hear from him while he's away. He needs this time for himself."

"Cain," I started, but he quickly interrupted.

"It was his idea, Paige. Totally. He wants this for us and if I wasn't absolutely sure of that, I'd be with him at Massanutten right now. Do you understand that?"

"But—"

"It's what he wants, Paige. It's what I want and you fucking know that it's what you want," he said firmly, his eyes now flickering over me with an expression that left no doubt in my mind that he was right.

"What is it that you think I want?" I challenged, because I had to hear it from his lips.