When she finally collapsed against the wall, sated, he withdrew his fingers from her pussy and ass. She let him guide her into position so that she was bent at the waist again, her bottom in the air. She blinked her hair out of her eyes, listening to the sound of his clothing rustling. He was removing his pants. Her ass clenched tight in renewed excitement, sending a sympathetic twinge to her clit. With her head down, she could see when he moved behind her. She exhaled some pent-up tension when she felt his touch at her hip, reassuring and warm.

“I’m going to go slow since I didn’t have anything to prepare you,” he said, referring to the fact that he usually got her ready for anal sex by penetrating her with a plug first.

She nodded, her long hair rustling around her like a stirred curtain. She stared blindly at the baseboard, every ounce of her awareness pinned to the feeling of Ian’s cock pressing against her ass.

“You know what to do,” he said, his voice sounding strained. “Press back against it.”

She did, and there was that familiar stab of pain as the head of his cock slipped into her ass. As always, however, it was quickly gone. He remained still, waiting for her to recover. Then she pressed again, gasping, and he slid deeper, his stalk penetrating her. After they paused that time, and her pain had gone, he held her hips in his hands and began to gently pump. The lubrication eased things, but she could tell by his grunts of mixed arousal and concern that her ass muscles were clenching tightly around him, clamping his cock and resisting him.

Or was she resisting him?

Maybe even though she’d decided to give herself no matter what, part of her was still wary. Perhaps doubt still resided secretly in her mind and flesh. Anal sex had always been intensely arousing for her with Ian, the vulnerability required in the act amplifying the eroticism and excitement of sharing it with someone she trusted. She didn’t want doubt and fear to steal the moment from her.

She exhaled, willing her muscles to relax.

Ian flexed his hips and slid further into her with a rough groan. “God that’s good, Francesca,” he muttered. He hadn’t fully penetrated her yet, but he began to thrust, gently fucking her asshole. A jolt of arousal stabbed through her. She started to bob her bottom against his cock, but he gripped her tighter, his thumbs pressing into her buttocks.

“Hold still. I’ve got it,” he rasped.

She stared at the baseboard, trying to keep still and panting, while he sawed his cock back and forth, back and forth, building a careful fire in her flesh. He had to bend his knees slightly, because of their disparate heights, and she wondered if he was uncomfortable. By the time he fully sheathed his cock inside her and pulled her ass against him, his full testicles pressing against her cheeks, she was on the verge of igniting. For a moment, he just held her.

“I can feel you perfectly. You’re so hot,” he said. She clamped her eyes closed at the sound of his barely leashed restraint.

“I can feel you, too. You’re so . . . deep,” she said in a strangled voice, her entire focus on his cock throbbing in such a vulnerable place.

“I have to move.”

“Yes,” she agreed.

Still holding her hips and buttocks tight, he took a step forward with his right foot, so that his hard thigh pressed against her hip, his other leg remaining between her thighs. It brought down his height sufficiently. He began to fuck her with long, firm strokes. A helpless, aroused whimper leaked out of her throat.

“All right?” he asked her, even though he didn’t stop thrusting his hips, sinking his cock in and out of her.

“Yes,” she moaned emphatically. As always, it felt so good to give herself to him in this way, somehow both sublime and raunchy at once, riding the very edge of sharp eroticism. He began to fuck her harder, shifting his weight forward slightly on his front leg with each thrust, batting her bottom with his pelvis, the resulting whapping sound exciting her. His hips and ass found their rhythm, that stab and rolling motion he did so well that it made her eyes cross every time. She began to keen in pleasure, her ecstasy mounting as he began to ride her even harder, and the sounds of his satisfied grunts and groans struck her ears, twining with her cries.

“That’s right,” he growled. “Now you’re giving yourself. I can feel it.”

And she was. She was holding nothing back, opening herself to him, straining to give him pleasure, racing after her own.

God help her.

“Go up on your toes again,” he ordered harshly, still plunging his cock into her faster and faster. “I’ll keep you steady. Do it, Francesca,” he said sharply when she didn’t immediately respond, she was so lost in pounding pleasure. She did what he’d demanded, flexing her calves and raising her heels. She gasped when he thrust. How did he always divine the mechanics of sex so well? The position raised her ass, giving him a new angle of penetration. It tightened her muscles around him, made her feel him inside her body even more acutely. His guttural grunt told her he’d felt the fresh pressure, too, and that he liked it. A lot. He pulled his leg back, so that both of them were behind her, and drove into her with increased force, making a scream pop out of her throat. It hurt a little, he took her so hard, but it aroused her much, much more.

“Just a few more seconds,” he grated out. “Stay up on your toes. It feels so fucking good. I’m going to come in you.”

Her eyes sprang wide when he plunged deep and she felt him swell huge. His cock jumped inside her, making her stifle another shout. She felt the warmth of his semen as he began to ejaculate, heard how he trapped his desperate roar in his throat so that he made a wild, muffled, growling sound as he came. It was difficult to say why she loved it so much, having him take his pleasure even while she was slightly uncomfortable. He gave her so much bliss so often and so precisely. She relished the chance to give him an equally searing release.

After his last shudder of orgasm had shaken him, he continued to hold her tightly against him, breathing harshly.

“Put down your heels,” he said eventually, his voice sounding both harsh and fond at once. She hadn’t even realized she’d remained under his command, even after his moment had passed.

She did as he directed, sighing in relief at the release of tension. She’d wondered why it was so arousing for her to sacrifice a little in order to give him pleasure, but when he put his hand between her thighs, she no longer cared. It was enough that it was true. Her body knew what it wanted, what it loved. She was soaking, aroused to the breaking point. She could hear his fingers moving in her well-lubricated flesh and the sounds of his satisfied grunt at the flagrant proof of her arousal. Her clit sizzled beneath his expert touch. In a matter of seconds, she was coming against his hand while his cock twitched high inside her.

* * *

The entire experience hadn’t only been an erotic and intimate one for Francesca, but also an intensely emotional one. She hadn’t been aware of any tears falling, but they must have at some point. A few minutes later, while they showered together, Ian gently washed her cheeks clean of them. He looked into her eyes as the hot water rushed around their naked bodies.

“I know,” he said quietly. “I know how hard this is for you. All of it. I’m sorry.”

She swallowed thickly. There. He’d apologized. Was she petty to be gratified? She didn’t think so. Wasn’t it better that he felt he at least had the power to apologize for his actions? Before, it’d been as if he didn’t apologize because it was like saying he was sorry for a tornado, hurricane, fate, or some other force of unpredictability.

Didn’t saying he was sorry imply—even in a small way—that he realized he had some choice in how he responded to all of this?

His thumb moved, stroking her cheek as she looked up at him soberly. “I just want to know for certain that I deserve to be by your side,” he said, his deep voice sounding hollow.

She shut her eyes upon seeing the pain he usually shielded so well. That dreaded feeling of helplessness hit her like a slamming wave. There was nothing she could say. He knew how she felt.

She went up on her toes again, ignoring the soreness of her calves, and took him into her arms, pressing their warm, wet bodies tightly together, using the only weapon she possessed to shield him from his misery.

Chapter Twelve

He’d said he’d take his fill of her that night, and he did just that after they returned to bed, making love to her with an almost wild desperation until they both collapsed and fell into exhausted sleep. The thought occurred to Francesca that he reminded her of a man feasting madly the night before he was forced into a barren imprisonment, but then she quickly shoved aside the thought, finding it unbearable to consider for long.

When they went down to breakfast the next morning together, she took his hand in hers when they reached the Great Hall. He turned, blinking at her gesture, his eyes widening slightly in surprise. She just gave him a small smile and didn’t let go, even when they walked past several of the staff and into the dining room, where James and Gerard already sat reading their papers and breakfasting.

The house staff, a technician that Lin had hired, and Anne were all bustling around in preparation for the press conference. It was to be held in the reception room, since it was large enough to seat the thirty or so reporters that had been invited, but small enough for good acoustics.