“I’m sorry for everything, Kelly,” he found himself saying. “You deserved so much better than the kind of husband I was to you.”

Kelly picked at the hem of her shirt. “It’s not all your fault, Brody. Lord knows I tried to blame you. I’m just as much to blame. I went into our relationship knowing I loved you a lot more than you loved me. I knew what I was doing.”

“Don’t say that. I did love you.” But not the way he loved Elisa. Whoa, where had that come from?

“You were never in love with me, Brody. Not the way I was with you.”

When he shook his head, she cut him off. “If I hadn’t been pregnant with Tyler, we would have eventually gone our separate ways. We never would have gotten married. You know that.”

Even though they both knew it was true, he couldn’t bring himself to say the words. He’d already done so many shitty things that he didn’t want to place another log on the fire. Hell, he felt like he’d be kicking a puppy.

Kelly moved her delicate shoulders beneath her cotton shirt. “I mean, I basically trapped you.”

“You did not trap me, Kelly,” he said firmly. He couldn’t allow her to think such a despicable thing. Women used pregnancy to trap men all the time, and oftentimes it was downright dirty. That hadn’t been what Kelly had done. “Getting married was my idea. I don’t regret it.”

“I know, but if I’d been honest with myself, I could have saved us both a lot of grief.” A humorless laugh popped out of her. “I kept thinking, ‘He’ll eventually love me. He just needs more time.’ ” She shook her head. A short strand of blond hair fell across her forehead. “I’m sorry, Brody.”

She was sorry? “What the hell are you apologizing for? I’m the one who screwed things up.”

“I can’t allow you to shoulder all the blame. I went into our marriage knowing you didn’t love me, then I tried to play the victim all those years.” She shook her head again and stabbed her teeth into her lower lip. “That wasn’t right of me.”

“Kelly, look at me.”

She lifted her gaze to his.

“I don’t, for one second, regret being married to you. Because of you, I have the best son any man could hope for. You were a great wife and you’re a wonderful mother.” He paused, trying to find adequate words worthy of her. “I know I wasn’t the easiest husband to have. You sacrificed a lot for me, and I’ll always be grateful for that. I’m the bastard who repaid you by breaking your heart. I just hope that one day you can…” He stopped and cleared his throat. “Forgive me.”

She stared back at him, her green gaze boring into his. “All these years I thought you didn’t care.”

He narrowed his eyes and studied her. “What do you mean?”

“For sleeping with that woman. And then you accepted the divorce papers so readily. I got the impression you were indifferent. Or that you didn’t care.”

Man, he really was the biggest of assholes. He’d never issued a formal apology to Kelly, which he’d always regretted. But not caring couldn’t be further from the truth. All he did was care. In fact, he cared way too much. The feeling had been eating a hole in his gut for the past four years.

Brody took one of Kelly’s hands in his. “Kelly…” he started, then sighed. “I have no excuse for the way I behaved. I know our marriage was already on the outs, but it was still the dirtiest thing I could have done. I never apologized to you and I’m sorry for that. And I’m sorry for what I did. I completely understand if you don’t have it in you to forgive me. I don’t deserve it anyway.”

She placed a hand on his cheek. “Everyone deserves forgiveness, Brody. The way things ended between us was like a huge weight on my shoulders for a long time. I needed to hear those words from you. Thank you.”

Brody guaranteed the weight on her shoulders was nothing compared to the weight on his. Despite that, there’d never been anyone else to blame but him. But even if he hadn’t made that poor decision, his and Kelly’s marriage most likely would have ended anyway. He just could have spared her a lot of pain if he’d been smarter.

“Don’t thank me, Kelly. Knowing I have your forgiveness is enough.”

She smiled, one that actually reached her eyes. He hadn’t seen one of those from her in a while. “Listen, about this thing with my mother… You know I would never take Tyler away from you if there was another way, right?”

The heaviness was back around his heart. “I know, but I still don’t like it.”

“I don’t like it either, and Colin and I are considering other options. We’ve been researching nursing homes in the area and trying to figure out a way to transport her this far. Us moving to Michigan is a last resort.” She paused, pulled in a breath, and held onto his hand tighter. “But it might be one we’ll have to resort to, despite Colin’s practice here and however hard it would be for him to close it down and move.”

Brody ground his teeth together to keep his emotions in check. The thought of living that far from Tyler made his blood run cold. “I can’t be away from him, Kelly. If you go to Michigan, be prepared for me to follow you.”

“And I wouldn’t stop you. You’re a wonderful father, and Tyler worships you.”

“I don’t know about that,” he argued.

Kelly leaned back in her chair and rolled her eyes. “Now you’re just being stupid. You don’t hear the way Tyler talks about you when he’s here. The boy idolizes you.”

“Does he really, or are you just saying that to make me feel better?” He would love nothing more than to have the relationship with his son that they used to have. Just another thing Brody was to blame for.

“He really does. The two of you being apart would be hard on everyone. That’s why Colin and I are trying to find an alternative.”

He supposed, for now, that would have to do. Moving three states away wasn’t something he wanted. However, if he had to, he’d move to Egypt for his son. Tyler was a part of him, and there was no way Brody would survive being that physically distant from him.

Only recently had a small snag developed. Her name was Elisa.

His feelings for her was the closest thing to being in love that he’d ever felt. Could he bring himself to let her leave? Would he be able to find another woman like her again?

EIGHTEEN

ELISA SET UP HER CAMERA equipment at the Golden Glove with her heart pattering a thousand miles an hour and a pit in the bottom of her stomach. The odd sensation of trepidation and love-sickness made her dizzy. So much so that the breakfast she’d hastily consumed that morning was now dancing at the bottom of her unsettled stomach. While unloading some lights, she’d almost had to drop the things and toss her food in the nearest trashcan. Wouldn’t that have been attractive?

Uh, hi, Brody. Please don’t mind my vomit breath.

Bad enough that she could no longer stand being around him without being smacked with her love for him.

She’d had more than enough time to prepare for the shoot that would finally take place, but nothing ever prepared her for being around Brody. Especially since they’d been intimate multiple times, and he’d have to be an idiot not to know how she felt about him. Hell, she might as well make a neon sign and strap it to her chest.

Hello everyone. I’m in love with a man who doesn’t love me back.

Whatever. She still had a job to do, and, despite her unwanted feelings for him, she still enjoyed his company and was willing to spend what time with him she had. She just hoped how she felt wasn’t so obvious that it made their work time together awkward.

The setup took about an hour, during which time the dining room was empty except for Charlene and a tall, sandy-haired man behind the bar. He went back and forth between talking on his phone and flirting with Charlene, who’d grin and blush like some teenager who’d been asked to the prom by the high school football star.

“Who is that?” Elisa asked Charlene.

The other woman used one of her hands to fan herself. “That’s Brody’s brother RJ. He used to work the bar here but now he’s only filling in until we can find a replacement for Anthony.”

Elisa gestured between Charlene and Brody’s handsome and flirtatious brother. “Are you two like…”

Charlene’s eyes grew wide. “Oh no.” She shook her head. “No, no, no. I mean, he’s hot but he’s just too… RJ.”

Okay, whatever that meant.

“RJ’s just a lot to take in,” Charlene said as though reading Elisa’s thoughts. “Especially if you don’t know him.”

“Why, is he obnoxious?”

The other woman lifted one shoulder in a half shrug. “No, not obnoxious. Just… consuming.” She grinned. “It’s hard to explain. But he’s a great guy and was a lot of fun to work with. But he’s actually not working right now. He just stopped by to talk to Brody.”

Elisa nodded, not really sure what else to say. Except to ask where Brody was because she was obsessed and everything. To mask her thoughts, she fiddled with her camera equipment, making sure everything was in place. Even though it was. Because she’d checked it half a dozen times already this morning.

“Brody’s in the kitchen with Anthony if you need him,” Charlene announced.

Oh Lord, she sees right through you.

Then Elisa remembered why she was there and that she was supposed to be working with Brody.

“Thanks,” she replied in her most carefree voice, which she wasn’t sure was convincing.

This time she’d brought her laptop with her so she could upload the digital images of the dishes and take a gander at them. Before wasting a whole bunch of time snapping photos of the finished dishes, she’d brought her smaller digital camera along with her to make extra sure they could move forward. That way Brody could see them and give his final approval of which plates to use.