“Well the clothes are that disgusting!” she exclaimed. “I can’t help that, can I?”

“You’re ridiculous,” I muttered.

The two of us looked at each other before my lips curved into a smile.

“Are you hungry?”

“Starved, what do you want, Pizza or Chinese?”

“I can totally go for some sushi,” I told her.

Sabrina rummaged around in her desk drawer, pulling out menu after menu.

“Do you just have menus lying around, waiting?”

“I grabbed the menus to the best fast food places around here when I moved in. We can’t cook here so what the hell else are we supposed to do.”

It made sense.

“Well… Good job. At least one of us thought of this.”

“When your parents are away for most of your life, you kind of learn how to fend for yourself.”

Sabrina lost her smile and I shifted on my bed uncomfortably. An awkward silence filled the room. Sabrina sighed and looked at me.

“Well anyway, it’s whatever. I’m going to go order. You might want to hang up your clothes before they get wrinkled.”

“Sure, no problem.”

Sabrina slipped out of the room, clutching her phone to her hand.

* * *

Dear Mom and Dad,


Hey guys. First I want to say that I miss you… A lot. College is a heck of a lot different than I thought it was going to be. But it’s a not a bad different. It’s actually a pretty great different. The girl that is sharing my dorm with me, Sabrina, is awesome. At first I thought she was a little weird and she thought the same about me. She had these My Little Pony dolls on her dresser, all lined up and staring at me.

Anyway, since I know you’re wondering, I wanted you two to know that I am eating right and taking my vitamins. I’ve been exercising three times a week just like at home. I’m doing everything that I promised you that I would do if you let me live in a dorm.

Anyway, I better get going. I have a lot of books to pick up and things to organize. Classes are going to start soon and I don’t want to be ill prepared. As usual I’ll give you a call on Sunday night.

I love the two of you and I can’t wait to see you over break. Say hi to everyone over there for me.


XOXOX

Lily

Who uses email anymore?

I do.

I closed the computer and put it on the desk. It was nearly ten and I was exhausted. At least I knew that this time I was exhausted for a reason. Sabrina was off somewhere with Elizabeth, doing whatever those two did. She left shortly after we ate and she wore one of the many different outfits she bought that day. They didn’t invite me on their little outing and I was okay with that. I had enough of the Bobbsey twins for the next couple of days.

I lay down on the bed and curled up on my side. My eyes were heavy and I felt each muscle of my body relaxing. For once I didn’t chastise myself for the time as I closed my eyes and let my body fall into a deep, deep sleep.

* * *

What was I thinking?

 I looked through my closet the next day. It held a rainbow of clothing, and more short skirts than I ever thought. How could I ever let Sabrina persuade me to buy all of these things?

“Don’t you dare over think this,” Sabrina said.

I jumped at the sound of her voice. I turned to see my roommate lying in bed, blankets wrapped around her body like some kind of cocoon. Her eyes were closed but there was a smile on her face.

“We had fun yesterday. You had fun yesterday so don’t you dare deny it. The clothes look kick ass on you. Just try it out, okay?”

“You sound like I actually have a choice,” I said.

“Even if you did have a choice, we both know what choice you would make.”

I closed my closet doors and went back to the bed.

“How was your night?” I asked Sabrina when she finally opened her eyes. “I didn’t hear you come in.”

“That’s because I’m like a ninja,” she joked. “I can get in and out of places without making a peep.”

“Are you going to actually get up? We have things to do! The weekend is only two days away.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know.”

Sabrina shifted but she made no move to remove the covers.

“Give me five more minutes.”

“Sure, whatever,” I said.

Sabrina turned over and dug her head underneath her pillow. Rolling my eyes, I left the dorm room and shuffled down the hallway. The hallway was quiet and my footsteps echoed against the wooden floor. Everyone was nursing some kind of hangover or bad decision made. Boys were tangled around some girls while others slowly moved around.

Ah the life of the college student.

“Well hello there sunshine!” I heard someone call down the hall.

My head whipped up and I spied Turner on the other side of the hallway. When he saw me looking at him he waved his hands.

“Hey,” I said and quickly walked down the hall.

I didn’t want Turner to continue to yell and wake up the rest of the dorm. When I approached him, Turner pulled me into his arms and hugged me.

 What was he doing? I didn't really mind. I hadn't been hugged by any guy that was not part of my family. This was already new territory for me and it seemed awkward. I could feel the heat radiating off of him and his body felt tense.

God, I was being hugged by a good-looking guy.

“How have you been? Did you decide whether or not you are coming to the concert?” Turner asked.

“I don’t know yet. It seems like fun but it’s right before classes. I’m not sure it’s a great idea.”

“Really? It’s the last hurrah before the nightmare of classes and exams. You have to come. It’s the only way to start the year off right.”

“I’ll think about it. But I’m not going to make any promises. There’s too much going on in my life.”

“Fair enough.”

Turner stepped back and stared at me.

“Do you want to go get some breakfast or something? We can eat some pancakes or something?”

“That sounds like a date and I don’t do dates.”

“Why not?”

“Because I don’t’ know you…”

“No, you don’t,” Turner admitted. “But how are you supposed to get to know me if you don’t go out with me?”

He was right, of course, but I didn’t let him know it.

I didn’t want him to know it.

“Sorry, Turner, but I can’t. I’m going out with my roommate actually. We have some plans and she’s just getting ready.”

“You’re roommates with Sabrina right?”

I nodded.

“Well then we can go to breakfast and you’ll still be back in time to go out with her.”

“What do you mean?”

“Rumor has it that she takes forever to get ready.”

It was true, Sabrina did take forever. I was running out of reasons to say no.

“Turner, I just can’t, okay?” I said. “I can’t.”

“You can’t?”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Because I don’t want to!”

I don’t know why the words came out of my mouth and the moment that they were out I wanted to pull them back in. Turner was cute and funny. He had a great personality. So why wasn’t I jumping at the chance to go out with him?

“I’m sorry,” I mumbled. “I’m sorry Turner.”

Putting my head down, I blindly walked away from him, only slightly aware that he was calling for me to come back. So much for the new me.

* * *

“You actually said that you didn’t want to go out on a date with him?!” Sabrina screeched as we sat at the café across the street from the college.

I winced and covered my ears with my hands. Passerby’s looked at us, frowning, and continued down the street.

“I actually said it,” I told her. “The words were out of my mouth before I could stop them really.”

“But why would you say no?” she asked. “I don’t understand. Turner is hot… Really hot! Plus, he’s a great kisser. You could definitely pick someone worse to be your first boyfriend.”

“You kissed him? And he should be my boyfriend?” I questioned. “Who said anything about a boyfriend? I don’t have time to worry about a boyfriend.”

“We kissed at a party, so what? And you’re pathetic. You’re not in high school anymore, Lily. You can’t hide behind your denim jumpers and converse high tops. If you want things to happen in your life you have to make them happen. There’s no more sitting on the sidelines. It doesn’t work like that.”

I wasn’t sitting on the sidelines…or at least I didn’t think I was. I was shy, what was so wrong with that?

“I can say the same to you. What are you doing except drinking and partying late at night. What do you want to happen in your life as a college student?”

Sabrina shrugged.

“I’m a freshman, I don’t have to figure that stuff out right now. And let’s face it, it doesn’t matter what I do. I’m a trust fund baby and my parents will always be there to pick me up if I screw up.”

“If only the rest of us could be so lucky,” I murmured as I drank my tea.

My mind kept flashing to Turner staring at me, asking me out.

Was I an idiot to say no? What if he really is as great as Sabrina says? Did I screw up my chance? I didn’t want to think like that. Was I supposed to just say yes? I barely knew him. But I could have given him a chance. I could have gone out on one date with him and it wouldn’t have been a big deal.

“Turner works at the bakery two doors down,” Sabrina said with a smirk.

“Yeah, and?”

“Don’t try to tell me that you’re not thinking about him. You think you made a mistake, don’t you?”