"Yes, Your Majesty. I manage the best I can." Should I have listened to my mother and worn a dress of a more muted color?

"The pain of a widow stays with her forever."

"Yes, ma'am."

"Your mother has not brought you here for consolation, though your husband was the best sort of man. She tells me you have fallen victim to rumors of a most insidious sort."

"I have, ma'am."

"I do not doubt your virtue. Your mother would never have raised a girl of questionable morality. Yet it is essential that you guard your reputation as if it were your greatest treasure."

"Let me assure you, ma'am, that I do. I have never behaved in a way that should have led to these stories." My mother blanched slightly as I spoke.

"You would not be here, Lady Ashton, if I had any reason to doubt that. As queen, I have been attacked by ill-natured gossips more than once. The reprehensible nature of these people knows no bounds. I hope that news of your meeting with me does something to quell these rumors."

"Thank you, ma'am. I am most obliged." I knew at once that she was referring to the scandalous stories that had circulated about her relationship with Mr. Brown, the Scottish ghillie. Some people had gone so far as to claim that they had been secretly married. My mother assured me that was nonsense, but I always had wondered what the queen's true feelings were. A woman in her position would be so very alone, surrounded by people, but no one who was her equal; who but a spouse could offer her real companionship?

Without another word to me, she directed her attention to my mother. "Now, Catherine, have you given further thought to potential brides for Eddy? I cannot tolerate him remaining unmarried for much longer."

The eldest son of the Prince of Wales, Prince Eddy, had been embroiled in any number of scandals of his own and always suffered in comparisons with his younger brother, Prince George. It came as no surprise that the queen would want to see her grandson married.

"Of all the names we have discussed, my thoughts keep returning to Princess May. She's a sensible girl, well brought up, with a strong sense of duty."

"She's fairly pretty, too," Lady Antrim said.

"What are her interests?" I asked. "I don't know her well."

"Her interests?" Lady Antrim's face was blank.

I was about to question whether the lady's interests were compatible with those of the prince but stopped myself in time. Stopped myself from speaking, that is. I couldn't keep from wondering how the poor girl would feel to be thrust upon the prince.

"As I said," my mother replied. "She's a very sensible girl. No silly romantic ideas."

"I shall invite her to Balmoral in the fall," the queen said. "Your efforts in these matters never go unappreciated, Catherine."

I don't know that I had ever before seen my mother look so pleased. But, then, I suppose that I'd never really seen her in her element. Here her skills as a matchmaker were a valuable commodity, while to me they were anathema. I was glad that she had friends who acknowledged her talent.

"Bainbridge is a decent man," the queen said. "He might do nicely for your daughter."

I sat very still, willing myself to remain silent.

"He might. Although Hargreaves has a better fortune."

"He is invaluable to the palace," the queen said.

"And so handsome!" Lady Antrim exclaimed.

"His work will force his wife to spend much time alone," the queen said.

"Unless she were to travel with him," I said.

"A romantic notion, child, but hardly appropriate. It is best for women to distance themselves from all things political. Of course, there are times when we cannot avoid these matters entirely, but it is a distasteful thing for which we are not made."

How I longed to draw attention to her hypocrisy! How could she, queen and empress, say such a thing? I was thankful for my corset, which prevented me from gasping. My mother sat, frozen, looking at me. I smiled at her.

"I don't know that I've ever had the equal of these cucumbers, Your Majesty," I said, picking up another sandwich from a silver plate. "Are they grown in your garden?"

"I haven't the slightest idea," she replied. "You are a very diplomatic girl. Perhaps you would do well with Hargreaves."

"Thank you, ma'am."

"I expect that you will make your decision soon. I will not host another tea to save you. Do not forget that we women require male protection, and it is that which you need."

Before we left, I removed a scone from the table and, careful that no one should see me, wrapped it in my handkerchief and hid it in my reticule. Meg would have her treat from the palace.


The invitations began pouring in again almost from the moment I left Windsor. My reputation was not entirely restored; mothers of impressionable young ladies still viewed me as dangerous, and the grandes dames of society were not about to suddenly decide that they liked me, but no one would dare exclude me from a guest list so long as I had the backing of the ruler of all Britannia. My own parent had manipulated me with the mental dexterity of a genius. I was utterly indebted to her for her assistance, yet now I had been, in effect, commanded by the queen herself to marry. Truly, my mother was brilliant.

I was eager to return to the letters in my study but felt that I owed her something in return for having come to my assistance. For the next week, I played the part of perfect society lady, flitting from the park to luncheon, to tea, back to the park, to garden party, to dinner, to the opera, to ball after ball after ball. It was exhausting, but not without its share of exhilaration. My heart quickened at the mere thought of dancing with Colin, and I relished every waltz I had with him.

On the last day of this whirlwind, I dined at Lady Elinor's, but rather than going on to a ball or party afterwards, I went home, choosing to walk because the night was a fine one. Colin escorted me, and I was reminded of a night in Paris when we had walked along the Seine, before his now dear face was so familiar to me. We cut through the park in the center of Berkeley Square and had just stepped into the street when a closed coach appeared, seemingly from nowhere, the horses running at a full gallop, careening towards us by the curb. Colin yanked me back, and I lost my balance, falling against the hard stone of the sidewalk. He bent over me to see if I was hurt.

"Go! See who it was!" I said, not wanting him to waste a moment. Of course there was no way he could catch up with the horses, but he did try admirably. I, meanwhile, pulled myself to my feet and was met by Davis, who did nothing to hide his horrified expression.

"Madam! You must sit down at once."

I have always secretly suspected Davis of having supernatural powers. The speed with which he situated me in the library, plied me with brandy, and ordered the footmen to secure the house was, without doubt, beyond that of an ordinary human. By the time Colin came in, my butler was tending to a rather nasty abrasion on my cheek. He stepped aside at once, passing the cloth he had been using to clean the cut to Colin, who knelt by my side, his face a mask of calm.

"The coach bore no markings," he said, neatly finishing the job Davis had started. "Are you hurt anywhere else?"

"I don't think so."

He took a bandage from Davis's outstretched hand. "Hold this against your cheek until the bleeding stops. I'm sorry I pulled you so hard."

"I'd rather have a scrape than to have been trampled by those horses," I said, draining the brandy, not keen to admit how shaken I really was.

Davis left us so that he could oversee the footmen, and as soon as we were alone, Colin took me in his arms, pressing my unwounded cheek against his chest. I started to cry, and the tears stung. He was silent until my breathing had slowed, but the moment it did, he started to speak, his voice all calm seriousness.

"There must be something of great significance in those letters, Emily. It is imperative that you decipher them as soon as possible, and I'm more than willing to assist you. Have you made any strides towards figuring out who stole the two from your desk?"

"No," I admitted. My eyes filled with tears again.

"Do not think me cold, but you cannot succumb to emotion right now. You are in danger, and the only way out is to discover whom it is your actions are threatening." I opened my mouth to reply, but he stopped me. "And do not tell me it is Charles Berry. Not unless you have facts, Emily."

"He has threatened me, Colin."

"I know. You're one of his favorite topics of conversation, after Versailles, of course. What he wants from you is not in the least honorable, but it does require that you are..." He cleared his throat. "Suffice it to say that running you down with a coach would be most detrimental to his hopes."

"But I have rejected him."

"He's convinced that he'll be able to bend you to his will once he is king. He has an amazing capacity for self-delusion."

"And he tells you these things despite knowing of your attachment to me?"

"I make a point of not bringing my own emotions into play when I am working."

"So you let him believe that you are not in love with me?"

"I let him believe what he wants."

"I don't much like this," I said.

"Forgive me, but I'm not about to lay bare my own feelings to such a man."

"But everyone knows — " I stopped.

"What everyone in polite society accepts as a given truth often does not entirely correlate with the information circulating amongst gentlemen."