The parking space in front of Deo’s unit was empty and Nita pulled into the adjoining spot.

“Five minutes,” Nita whispered. “I’ll just wait for fi ve minutes, and if she doesn’t come home, I’ll call her again in the morning.”

When she realized she was staring at her watch, Nita tilted her head back and closed her eyes, trying not to silently count the seconds.

❖

As Deo jumped from her truck and made a dash for her condo, she heard a car door open and close nearby. Surprised that anyone was out in the middle of the night in the worst weather she could ever remember, she slowed and peered through the rain. A second later, she recognized Nita. Her swift surge of pleasure was almost immediately replaced by concern.

“Jesus, Nita,” Deo yelled, grabbing Nita’s arm and pulling her under the shelter of the short roof that protected her front door. “What the hell are you doing out here? It’s four in the morning!”

“I just stopped by to see if you were all right. I guess I fell asleep.”

Chilled from her sudden soaking, she cuddled closer to Deo as Deo fumbled with the lock. “I should go so you can get some sleep.”

Deo pushed the door open and tugged Nita inside. She kicked the door closed with her foot, grasped Nita’s shoulders, and kissed her hard. “Don’t be crazy. You’re not going anywhere.”

Nita automatically wrapped her arms around Deo’s shoulders and kissed her back. “You’ve got to be beyond exhausted. Everything has

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just gotten so crazy so fast, I wasn’t sure when I would be able to see you again.” She hugged Deo closer. “Now I have. That’s enough.”

“Maybe it is for you,” Deo murmured, kissing Nita’s neck. “But it isn’t for me. I need a shower to get warm, and then I want to crawl into bed with you.”

Nita leaned back and smiled fl eetingly. “What happened to your mandate about no sex?”

“I didn’t say anything about sex.”

“Good, because you’re going to sleep.” Nita grasped Deo’s hand, guided by instinct and too tired to think of all the reasons she shouldn’t be doing what she was about to do. She wasn’t just tired—she was frightened, she was cold, and she was lonely. Life had turned upside down in twenty-four hours, and the one solid point in her universe was Deo. “Would you mind very much if I shared your shower?”

Deo shot her a glance. “Do I look dead to you?”

“No,” Nita replied throatily, “you look…delicious.”

“Cut it out,” Deo said unconvincingly.

Nita laughed. “Say that like you mean it.”

“I can’t.”

“Good.”

When they reached the bathroom and Deo began shedding her clothes, Nita realized she’d made a mistake. What Deo needed was a hot shower and as much sleep as she could get. And Nita couldn’t even look at her without wanting to touch her. She backed toward the door.

“On second thought, I’ll skip the shower for now.”

Naked, Deo reached around her and held the door closed with her hand. Her body pressed against Nita’s. “Take your clothes off.”

“Deo—”

“Do it, Nita,” Deo whispered and moved in for a kiss.

“You said you weren’t going to have sex with me.” Trembling, Nita turned her head away so that Deo’s kiss only caught the corner of her mouth. “This is cruel.”

“You don’t like the way you feel right now?”

Drawing a shaky breath, Nita shook her head back and forth. “I don’t like wanting you so badly it hurts and knowing I can’t have you.”

She turned her head back, struggling not to cup Deo’s breasts in her hands. “I’m trying to give you what you want. You said you didn’t want it to be just about sex.”

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“What do you want, Nita?” Deo held still even though she wanted to rub herself over Nita’s body. “Forget about me and what I want or what you think I want you to be. Just say what it is you want.”

The silence grew until the air felt so heavy Nita didn’t think she could pull it into her lungs. Her heart raced and her chest ached. She couldn’t remember the last time she thought about what she wanted instead of what she couldn’t have and shouldn’t desire and didn’t dare dream of.

“Tell me,” Deo said, her eyes boring into Nita’s, her mouth just a breath away from closing over Nita’s.

“I want…” Nita shuddered and gripped Deo’s arms. Deo’s skin was so hot she felt feverish. “I want to make love with you and not be afraid you’ll be gone as soon as you come. I want to see you on the street and not have you pretend you don’t know me. I want…god, I want…”

“Go ahead,” Deo whispered. “You can say it.”

“I want not to hate how much I want you.”

“Do you?” Deo inched away until their bodies didn’t touch, but she cradled Nita’s cheek in her hand, still watching her eyes. “Do you hate wanting to make me come?”

“No,” Nita said breathlessly.

“Do you hate wanting me inside of you, making you come?”

Beyond words, Nita shook her head.

“Are you afraid of me?”

Nita closed her eyes. The intensity in Deo’s face made it impossible for her to think. She was turning liquid inside, her bones were melting.

She felt so exposed it was as if she had no skin. She almost expected to look down and see rivulets of blood collecting around her feet.

“Nita,” Deo murmured. “Nita, are you afraid of me?”

“No, God, no.”

Wordlessly, Deo unbuttoned Nita’s blouse. Then she reached around her and released her bra, gently baring her breasts. She kissed her as she opened her slacks and pushed them down along with her panties. “Let’s shower.”

While Deo turned on the water and the room fi lled with steam, Nita removed her shoes and the rest of her clothes. The shower was small and when she stepped inside she couldn’t help but touch Deo. “I suggest we make this fast, or I can’t be responsible for what happens.”

• 223 •

RADCLY fFE

Deo grinned as she lathered her body with a bar of soap. “What happened to that great self-control?”

“I lost it somewhere after the second time you rubbed your breasts over me.” Nita refused to look down, because if she saw any more of Deo than her face, she was going to drop to her knees and take her right there. “Give me the soap.”

“I have to be back out there in about three hours.” Deo swirled soapy circles over her breasts and belly with both hands. “I’ve been keyed up all night, because of everything that’s going on and because when I wasn’t too busy to see straight, I thought about making love with you.”

Nita turned her back so she couldn’t touch her. “The shower will relax you and you’ll be able to sleep.”

“I need to come fi rst. If you weren’t here, I’d fantasize about you and masturbate.”

“God,” Nita moaned. “Stop it.”

Deo pressed against Nita’s back. “You can watch me or you can let me fuck you.”

Nita leaned forward and braced her arms against the shower wall, the tension in the pit of her stomach so profound she wasn’t sure she could keep standing. “If I let you come inside me, will you go to sleep then?”

“Yes,” Deo grated, thrusting against Nita’s ass.

“Well, seeing as how it’s therapeutic.” Nita pivoted, but immediately pushed Deo away with both hands on Deo’s shoulders.

“Go get ready. I’ll be there in a minute.”

“It’s what you want?”

Nita kissed her softly and ran her fi ngers through her hair. “Yes.

It’s exactly what I want.”

Deo stepped out of the shower and grabbed a towel on her way out of the bathroom. Nita took her time drying off, enjoying the novel feeling of not needing to hurry, of not fearing that if she didn’t grab every ounce of pleasure just as quickly as possible, it would all disappear like mist at sunrise. She was excited, her skin so sensitive it was almost painful to touch. She was wet and swollen, and she throbbed with the persistent ache of desire. Her arousal felt wonderful, and it was beyond wonderful to set it free.

Nita wrapped a towel around her breasts and joined Deo in the

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bedroom. A single light burned on the far side of the bed, illuminating Deo as she lay on her side, a sheet pulled up to her waist, her head propped in her hand as she watched the door. She smiled as Nita approached.

“I thought you might fall asleep,” Nita said, letting the towel fall.

“Not likely,” Deo said, lifting up the sheet.

Nita slid beneath it and reclined on her side, facing Deo. She traced the circles beneath Deo’s eyes. “Sweetheart, you’re so tired.”

“I need you,” Deo whispered. “More than anything.”

When Deo inched closer to kiss her, Nita felt a fi rm weight settle against her thigh and caught her breath. As she drew Deo’s tongue into her mouth, she caressed Deo’s side and the curve of her hip until she reached her knee. Then she skimmed her fi ngers up the inside of Deo’s leg until she closed her fi ngers around the cock nestled between Deo’s legs. She pushed her tongue deeper into Deo’s mouth and slowly rotated her wrist.

Deo groaned and pushed her hips forward.

“Don’t be in a hurry,” Nita whispered, kissing Deo’s throat. She kept up the motion of her hand, a steady, rhythmic push and pull. Deo’s breath shivered in and out and Nita clenched inside. “I love to excite you.”

“You’re making me a lot more than excited. I’m so pumped.” Deo jerked and thrust into Nita’s fi st.

“Be good.” Nita licked Deo’s nipple. “You’re not allowed to come in my hand. Not this way.”

“Then stop what you’re doing,” Deo gasped.

Nita laughed and pushed Deo onto her back, then straddled her.

She hissed in a breath as Deo’s cock bumped against her sex. “Oh, I’m going to like having you inside me.”

“Jesus,” Deo whispered, sliding one hand down between them to steady herself. “I need to be inside you. Are you ready?”